Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, at school, I was asked to play a complex piano piece in front of my class, teachers and guests. I nailed it, but what stood out most for everyone was how I apparently looked like I was being possessed while performing. FML
Today, at my school's Midnight Madness, I was selected to show my school spirit in a contest. Being drunk, I decided to hump the school mascot in front of 300 people. FML
Today, I was hypnotized and talked into telling everyone truths about myself at a show my family and I went to. I don't know what I said. All I know is that my family laughs whenever I'm near them. They won't tell me what happened. FML
Today, I performed in my school's choir concert. The girl next to me started to pass out, and I grabbed her so she wouldn't hit her head. After we were done performing and the curtains closed, my choir teacher dragged me off stage and said I was getting an F for "creating a distraction". FML
Today, I was feeling adventurous and decided to freeball it to school. As I went to sit down during first class, I managed to sit on my own balls, scream, then collapse on the floor gasping. My teacher thought I was screwing around and gave me detention. FML
Today, I walked into work after being completly wasted last night. I was sitting in a meeting when all of a sudden the presenter had gotten an e-mail saying "crazy girl dances on tables at local bar". So obviously everyone wanted to watch it. That crazy girl was me. FML
Today, I got hypnotized in front of my entire school. Once I was hypnotized the guy told me that the hottest celebrity in the world was in the audience and then he told me to point out who I saw. I said I saw Mick Jagger. I'm a guy. FML
Today, I fell asleep in class. Usually, people just sit still when asleep. Nope, not me. Not only had I been violently rocking and nodding my head, the teacher stopped class for everyone to see for 5 minutes as she made jokes. What woke me? The intense laughter, followed by embarrassment. FML
Today, I was playing a virtual reality game at a gaming convention. I got so into it that I didn't realize I was screaming and flailing around in. A crowd had gathered to watch my dumbass embarrass myself. FML
Today, I was sitting at my desk in school, and I was really bored. I started playing with the strings on my pants, only to realize 5 minutes later it looked like I was fondling my dick. FML
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Top comments
4bbaf9d3caaa8f84 20
wow, that sucks. At least you didn't call out someone's name like your mom's, dog's, sister's etc...
FrootLoops_ 0
that must have been awkward afterwards :)
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Comments (294)
bizz8290 0
floor: i love you!!! you: turn the **** around!!!!! floor: why? you: so i can **** your ass!!! floor: what the ******* hell??? you: you heard me turn around so we can have some monkish ****! floor: but last time you got ass it is my turn!!!! you: i don't give a **** what you want just turn around so i can get laid!!! teehee fyl
Uber_G33k 0
You have some SERIOUS problems, my friend.
mlipro 0
Don't quit your day job.
walkmywaynot 0
lol love that
jdimaria3 13
not funny at all just shut the **** up
mystomachurts 3
#45- You're a real idiot. The OP never said it was a fellow classmate who hypnotized him.. that was your own assumption that you went off on a tangent about. Most schools have assemblies where they hire a professional hypnotist, usually on half days or towards the END of the school year after all the tests have been taken and there isn't much else left to do (Ahem like now.) Pompous.
Dinner 0
#186 what do you mean most schools hire a professional hypnotist? Do you mean elementary schools, cuz if you're in, like, fourth grade, you shouldn't even be reading these FMLs. And what makes you think it's more likely for that someone that the school hired to hypnotize him to hump the floor, or someone that he knows, as a joke?
FrootLoops_ 0
lmfao bizz8290, your really creative, i can give you that :)
bizz8290 0
i try
SVelasquez 0
hahahahaha, nice. Fail.
dragon_champion7 0
YDI because it wouldn't have worked unless you either allowed yourself to be hypnotized or you are simply weak minded (sorry not trying to be a dick but it's true)
Nal0 0
omg, how 'horrible' would it have been if you just came. if it were me,i wouldnt have give a shit.haha
Jareth_fml 0
NEVER volunteer to be hypnotized. That's just asking for trouble.
ddrluna 2
148 has it right. It's not like you lose control of yourself through hypnosis. I've been hypnotized before and it pretty much is exactly like being a little drunk. You're relaxed to the point where you don't care what you're doing in front of a crowd.
Anu_Ra 0
XD XD XD OMG THAT'S SO FUNNY!
Alaskabear 0
LMFAO