nightjay
Cincinnati, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I got grounded for having a boner when I woke up. FML
nightjay tells us more.
nightjay 21
Hi, OP here! It was just a casual morning today, and since my mom usually waits for me to get up (because I'm usually pretty lazy out of bed), they wouldn't leave my bedside. Not wanting to embarrass myself in front of my extremely Catholic mom, I said no when she kept on telling me to get up. Finally, laying on my side (facing away from my mom) she boils over and pulls the covers off, and in my attempt to save my covers from falling on the floor, she sees my boner and immediately assumes I was masturbating. I don't know which was worse: getting grounded, getting the "masturbation is evil" talk, or having my mom see my dick. Triple FML. Thanks for the support! All the penis-puns make me smile :)
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Top comments
DarkLink9001 15
Do your parents understand... well.. anything?
bellydancer82 15
How DARE you have a boner! Shame on you for being a normal male! Sorry OP, that really sucks, I wonder why your parents aren't more understanding.
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Comments (125)
raz0rf0x 8
when you're 18 sue your parents for abuse and never let your children meet them. these people need to die off for the sake of humanity's future.
will968 15
I would tell them to go **** themselves if they even thought to ground me for something that's natural and somewhat uncontrollable
Jachin357 28
OP I will give you some valuable advice. if you ever pop a random boner during the day or have some morning wood that just won't go away, stand and flex your legs for like 30 seconds. Flexing your legs will pump your legs full of blood, thus helping get rid of the boner faster! it works for me every bloody time! or just do squats...
Bearsmomma 30
This particular time his mom was standing by his bed.
thenewgirl29 20
Grounded for masturbating, wow. Masturbation is a perfectly natural and healthy thing and helps you get it "in touch" with your sexuality. I don't think parents should impose the idea that exploring your body is shameful or something to feel guilty about.
Jinxsie 27
The sad part is he didn't even **********.
Bearsmomma 30
I agree, however, I feel it was more about wasting her time. She was trying to wake him up.
healthcarechick 9
Your parent(s) or whoever grounded you are stupid. You can't help it if you wake up with morning wood! Jesus ppl are stupid
assem977 7
wish i could help you feel better OP. That really is a hard problem to rub off
DragonSlayer1234 8
I mean it kind of makes sense. Now before anyone dislikes this and gives me hate I just want to say that it seems kind of suspicious if u don't want to wake up and have a boner. Now, I'm not saying what she did was right but I'm not saying she was wrong either.
Jinxsie 27
What?
InfiniteSunshine 32
I don't know exactly what you were trying to say or your point, but I understood the "now in not saying what she did was right, but I'm not saying she was wrong either." No, the mother was completely wrong, she was ignorant, intrusive, violated the OP's privacy, and unnecessarily punished him. She also lectured him on "evil masturbation," just fueling how wrong she is, masturbation is not only natural, but very healthy, it allows a person to explore and understand their body/needs, and the chemicals released when doing it sustain and provide for a healthy body. What I'm saying basically is, the mom was wrong, plain and simple. No matter how hard you try, her actions can't be justified as they have no logic to them.
blacklightening 11
why would ur parents even know that. do u just wake up every morning and find them staring at ur dick
Jinxsie 27
This was just a case of bad timing.
Bearsmomma 30
OP explained more in the comments. #115
DrowningLessons 19
It probably because its bigger than your dad's dick.
cuz803 46
They grounded you for having a morning wood...