Today, I got a call from an ex, demanding to know why my Facebook relationship status was set as married. I got married a few months ago, and I quietly explained this to her. My wife overheard and now thinks I've been cheating all along. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out that my wife had been debating leaving me for an old boyfriend from high school. They rekindled their relationship on Facebook, and talking on the cell phone. Both things I insisted she have. FML
Today, I checked my facebook, and my wife of 5 years was listed as single. I then write on her wall that it is ok to announce to be married. She writes back saying that we have to talk and to come to the kitchen. My wife divorced me over facebook. FML
Today, my ex messaged me out of the blue saying she found my fiancée's Tinder profile. I told her there was no way it was true. It actually was. FML
Today, I got a call from the guy I have been seeing. I wasn't him. It was his wife wondering why I have her husband's number. FML
Today, I logged on to Facebook to find that my boyfriend's relationship status had changed to being in a relationship with his ex. I asked him about it, and all he said was, "I guess I forgot to break up with you." FML
Today, I found out that my now ex-fiancé was still married to her ex throughout the entire relationship. What I didn't realize was that I ended up paying for the divorce, and 3 months later she got married to someone else. FML
Today, I learned that I'm in that special kind of relationship where my ex thinks we're still married, no matter how many times I tell him that we were divorced over a year ago. FML
Today, I found out the guy I was seeing was married, with a kid, when his wife sent me a friend request on Facebook. FML
Today, a woman screamed at me for five minutes, demanding to know how long I'd been having an affair with her husband. I explained for the second time that she'd dialed a wrong number. FML
Today, I was visited by a high school friend who lives in another state. She was furious because I got married a few months ago, and she kinda had feelings for me. I had to ask her to leave. Here's the funny thing: she's been married for 4 years and they have a son, and she didn't even invite me to her wedding back then. FML
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Top comments
mona_is_here 10
Unless your wife has serious self-esteem and jealousy issues, you can still explain it to her.
LoveMySoldier82 0
Should have been rude about it. That way, you don't have to worry about your ex and your wife will feel good that you "really told her!" Besides she is an ex... who care? Tell her your heart was able to somehow move on and you found someone you love and actually want to marry.
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Comments (106)
teeaitch 2
Mona is here and Mona is stunning.
KiddNYC1O 22
She's also up there. ^
skyeyez9 25
Change your phone number or block the ex from calling. Remove her from your fb page.
thew_fml 14
theOP didn't say whispering, he said quietly. some people are friendly, or at least not hostile, to ex's. and thats ok. the wife needs to learn to trust. love without trust is not love
very_ugly_girl 0
Who does not do that. I love talking to other men while my husband is around, Turns me on.
yazmi_09 3
you sound like a dumb ass, and besides if you're a "very_ugly_girl" how do you even have other men to talk to?
zenti 2
She puts out on the first date?
yazmi_09 3
hmm good point zenti! I'm guessing if she has low self esteem she prolly does
FML_cutiepie 0
what is wrong with u !!!???!!! u say this then you say that ......... r u ok CAN ANYBODY FIND OUT WHATS WRONG WITH HER (If that is a her)
yazmi_09 3
I think she has a multiple personality disorder
FML_cutiepie 0
me to:)
Ninjafriends 1
A crazy ex and an angry, suspicious wife... and you didn't even get any extra tail.
DakotaCat 4
Your ex needs to piss off
KingOfTheBrocean 2
Why bother picking up for an ex of a long term relationship? It's not going to better your life in any way. There is no such thing a being friends when you have to be so cordial around somebody. You can only speak about neutral topics and explain what's been going on in life and that's it, or else somebody gets angry or jealous. Move on, make REAL friendships with people who aren't trying to own you and are looking out for your best interest. Ex girlfriends are nothing but trouble.
RedPillSucks 33
If your current wife is jealous because of the phone call and thinks you're cheating, you might want to take a serious look at the kinds of women you choose to be a partner. Looks like you traded one psycho for another. Good luck, and thanks for all the fish.
Mirorbo 27
This sounds like a bad daytime drama from tv.
soldier4life_88 0
psycho...