Today, I got a call from a restricted number. When I answered, it was a prank call. The kids on the other end had porn on high volume and put the phone next to the speaker. Way to remind me that I'm still a virgin. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was called a pervert. On a phone sex line. FML
Today, I found out that the phone number I switched to used to host an amateur phone sex hotline. I found this out after getting several calls by teenagers, who sounded as if they were masturbating, even as I yelled that they had the wrong number. FML
Today, after getting off the phone with a client, I got horny so I put on some porn and cranked one out. After I'd finished, I realized I hadn't ended the call and neither had my client. They heard everything. FML
Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML
Today, I got a prank call. I now wish he'd call back so I can actually talk to someone. FML
Today, my phone rang just seconds after I left a conference meeting to go use the restroom. It wouldn't have been a problem, except it seems one of my friends thought it would be funny to change my ringtone to a woman having an orgasm. FML
Today, I got a call from the girl I like. I got very excited so I quickly picked up. As it turns out, she was actually prank calling me, pretending to be a "liposuction telemarketer" but forgot to press *67. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. My phone started ringing and it was my Mom, she said I could answer it. As I answered the phone my girlfriend started playing with my dick. I moaned. Loud. FML
Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML
Today, I was making love with my girlfriend and my landline rang. Obviously, I let it go to voicemail. At the very moment I was about to cum, I heard my mum's voice on my voicemail: "Hi sweetheart!" FML
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Top comments
fadingaway 17
''virginat16?'' YDI if you think there's something wrong with that.
BlaiseTheCraze 0
how do you know it was ****? the other side of that call may have been dirtier than you think
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Comments (216)
raw_tigahh 2
do something about it. get a bf
thefull9yards 4
being a virgin is something you can change. YDI.
iSitt 0
easier for women to fix. Just go to a bar alone and not say "no".
Tasanasanta 0
OP is 16, pretty sure you can't go to a bar at that age....
raw_tigahh 2
plenty of things you can do at that age
gooBUZZ 0
Why's she complaining that she's still a virgin if she's only 16 anyway? Kids these days are stupid. Get a boyfriend, he'll be up for it. Good day, OP.
starile 20
I'm with #84. Stop worrying so much about sex, there is zero shame in being a virgin at your age. Sex will happen eventually, and you'll have it a million times, and it won't be no thang. Focus on important things that actually matter for now, like school. Sexually active people are NOT something to idolize.
KoRnLeader 0
you better wear protection while you listen to **** over the phone or you might get hearing aids.
flotar 0
i'm rofl @144
Molkerei 0
when I opened this I expected to see the name Steve Carell. your 16. I really can't expand on this your bloody 16.
Danny_B 4
I lost my virginity at 14?
gymnasticslove 0
#165, that's your problem, I'm 16 and I'm still a virgin..it's really not that big of a deal. OP focus on sports and school, alot if my friends who lost their virginity at a young age regret it now
pyrodrake 0
a) Look at your profile name b) You're from Edmonton. Hence, virgin.
habeybaby25 11
oh god get a bf,that could change soon enough...I'm still a virgin,being a virgin is nothing to be shamed about,virginity is gods most precious gift to humas,keep it for the right person OP.
livgasms 4
lol legal age in the UK is 16 and a lot of people lose their virginity at like 14/15/16 but I know plenty people past 16 who are virgins and no one cares; it isn't a big deal. however sex is lush, so get a boyfriend and get laid ASAP. :*
TheRealStunts 27
#165 shame on you then -_- thats nothing to be proud of
DahkLohd 4
Go out and get some!
marmlr339 14
agreed. FYL and YDI OP if you're older than 21. FYL if your under 21
mzwill 0
op is a *****
DahkLohd 4
It says you're from Texas...just ask your dad or your brother; I'm sure neither of them would mind helping you with your little "problem." I say "problem" because you're only 16. What's wrong with being a virgin at that age?
Dman1760 0
^ Lolol
gelica87 0
she's only 16...I lost my virginity at 18
darkbluelining 6
I agree that there isn't anything wrong with being a virgin at sixteen. However, an "incestuous hick" jab directed toward everybody in the state of Texas is probably not the way to go about making your point. All it really does is make you look ignorant and disrespectful. I know you wouldn't like it if people went around judging you and making snide remarks based on completely untrue stereotypes. Where do you live? I'm sure there are a few from which to choose.
KelceyLoves 0
...Yee haw!!
busted23 0
31- WTF does Texas have to do with anything. stupid stereotyping bitch.
knoll4007 3
hahaha thanks ^ u made my day ^^
irockfendergirl 0
22- Are you serious? Calling a virgin a ***** is ridiculous. Please look up the definition of ***** in the dictionary.
kayybby 1
You're statement about Texas was just ignorant and stupid. People do that all over the world, so maybe you should rethink you're post? I'm sure people do it where you live too.
wesley99 0
Ya I'm pretty sure #31 was just joking about the whole Texas thing, so all of you guys can put your guns away now
pyrodrake 0
I'm sure he was really eluding to the Amish. Texas just makes idiots like bush, and the fatest cities.
busted23 0
174- **** you too. you can't talk shit about Texas if you live in Canada. and Bush did a much better job than what Obama is doing
Freeze_fml 17
Texas produces wonderful human beings such as myself. Now go **** a strip of bacon with a hockey stick and use your abundant supplies of maple syrup as lube. Good day, eh.
MNDUBBER 0
@ 68- Pics or it didn't happen.
Zacharyscot 0
176. bush didnt do anything for america but f this place up. obama is tryin to fix all the mistakes that bush did. yeah i liked bush better than obama anyway.
busted23 0
183- I don't think the health care plan is helping very much. more people said no to it than yes but it still passed.
Zacharyscot 0
dude his health care plan is better than any around. believe it or not but it is. it was hard for me to believe it to but it is. yeah obama promised us all this stuff and we still havent gotten it yet. but its gone take atleast 3 or 4 more terms of people like hime to get the job done.
BlaiseTheCraze 0
how do you know it was ****? the other side of that call may have been dirtier than you think
Tasanasanta 0
Phone sex!
BDTM 0
#3 win #19 fail
Dino33mite 0
exactly, mabye it was a butt call
darcimckeown 3
that's what I was thinking
jisaac09 25
Who blocks their number for a butt call???
PoopNuggetLeader 4
What rounds are those?
alaaloo_fml_fml 0
Aw. There was no way they could've known........
nathan5 0
The power of speech?
alaaloo_fml_fml 0
The prank callers, unless they know OP, couldn't have known they are a virgin.
bigbadtim 7
Hope you have no hard feelings....
chungy92 5
don't think she did it's a girl
iliketurdles 7
LOOOOL, I actually laughed. Thank you.
memo619 0
I would of fapped to that o.o
CoonAndFriends 0
O.O Awkward.
mintcar 10
There is no such thing as "would of."
kikibisweet 0
Yeah its "would have" lol
junkboy 4
that's not much of a prank call...
Doortje 30
YDI for being oversensitive. Just leave your phone on and start doing ohter things, they'll hang up because there's no fun in that. But if I were one of those prank callers and you'd start sobbing I would probably piss my pants. Grow up OP.
Jaydos 0
Should have pretended you were a cop and busted the kids for being on ****
mageoreh 0
**** isn't illegal, dumbass.
thrAsHeRr9081 16
It is if you're under 18, dumb ass
gabsta 3
urmm how do u know if its actuall **** though? it couldve just been sounds... maybe.. hahahabut yea it is illegal if ur under 18
Jaydos 0
Sit the **** down 129!
GoodLookingGeese 10
I don't get your problem??? You have a problem not to be a ****? well... get laid if that so... geeee
sarah48_fml 0
having sex doesn't mean you are a ****.
Sun_Kissed18 25
but she's 16, there is no rush to have sex when you are 16. Now if she was pushing 20 she might have reason to be annoyed
obewonstrangeone 18
I'm nearly twenty, and I'm still a virgin. I personally see nothing wrong with it. I haven't wasted my first time on the wrong people I've dated. I don't see why there is so much pressure for people to lose their virginity before graduating highschool.