Today, I found out two of my rats are pregnant. The breeder told us that all of them were male, only one ended up being male. I now have 20+ rat babies on the way and no idea how to take care of them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my pet rat had babies. We've only ever owned one rat. FML
Today, I got a new cat. It was fine for a couple of hours until it gave birth in my kitchen. The seller claims to have no idea that it was pregnant. Now I have to take care of 7 cats instead of 2. FML
Today, I had to explain to my 22-year-old boyfriend that mice do not grow up to be rats. FML
Today, I was cleaning off my couch so my nephew could crash here for a few nights. It's been so long since we've sat on it that it is now inhabited by rats we didn't know were in the house, including newly-born ones. FML
Today, my hamster gave birth. The babies were very cute and I couldn't resist petting one. Apparently touching a baby hamster will cause it's mother to reject and devour it. I am now know in my family as "The Hamster Slaughterer." FML
Today, the cat I rescued out of the rain unexpectedly gave birth under my couch. Realistically, I know there’s no way to keep six cats but every time I think about separating the babies from their mom and litter-mates, I sob uncontrollably to the point of hyperventilating. FML
Today I opened the door for my cat and he brought in a rat with him. Now the rat is hiding in my house. FML
Today, I found out that yet again I'm having twins. Sounds great and all, but the only problem is that my mother-in-law is the one pregnant. Oh boy, I'm fucked! FML
Today, the last of my close friends announced she is pregnant. Meanwhile, I'm single and my nest is empty. Well, not exactly, because even my freaking cat is pregnant. FML
Today, while vacuuming my car, I discovered a hole in the floor under one of the seats. Unable to figure out where it came from, I took it to a professional, who informed me that a family of rats has been making my car their home for the last several months. How lovely. FML
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Top comments
Confectionary Rats 2
try the rattit subreddit, they'll give you tips and you might find someone willing to take at least some of them to a good home
rawrgasm19 15
male rats have huge balls... how could you not tell...?
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Comments (34)
Razell 13
Find a snake breeder that needs feeder rodents for his livestock.
wanted_2_want 40
get a cat.
zuckerburg 21
why? they're assholes who would probably enjoy the fact you're overrun with rats
Confectionary Rats 2
try the rattit subreddit, they'll give you tips and you might find someone willing to take at least some of them to a good home
Dave_Davington 35
Find someone who has piranhas. I'm sure they'll take them off your hands for you.
BurnInDemonFire 39
And they'll take your hands off you, as well.
BurnInDemonFire 39
I know a guy, who knows a guy, who knows a guy who'll take care of whatever you want, for a price. Very clean, very discreet, and no paper trails. They'll even dispose of the evidence afterwards. I'd ask on your behalf, but I'm saving my one favor for a rainy day.
BurnInDemonFire 39
Four down votes, huh? The Mafia really don't like you making jokes at their expense.
zuckerburg 21
No but the whole Saudi Arabia thing you did there is in bad taste
BurnInDemonFire 39
That "Saudi Arabia" thing was a joke about hand-feeding rats to piranhas.
Phill_24 6
Buy about 80 turtles... you should be fine
rawrgasm19 15
male rats have huge balls... how could you not tell...?
AlyCo55 13
my male rat didn’t have them yet, they don’t have them when they’re really young
rawrgasm19 15
But they drop before they're sexually mature. You can tell even without picking them up, they're that big.
RichardPencil 32
Make ratatouille. Jus’ sayin’ ;)
Shawnie Gallant 24
Join “rats and mice are awesome” on Facebook and they’ll help you
Shawnie Gallant 24
If you don’t have social media, I’ll explain quick. Obviously separate. When fed their tummies will have a white color, it’s called a milk band. If there’s no milk band there’s a problem. Mom will take care of the rest just check on them. At 4.5-5 weeks old separate the males from the females. The mom should be able tot each them how to eat just ensure there’s extra food in their cage. You might be better off with making bin cages for the time being, because rat pups can fit through bars. Good luck and if you have questions you can message me. I had a litter of pups last year and learned a lot.