Today, I felt sad, useless and like I could never achieve anything. To cheer myself up, I wanted to smell some essential orange oil. I couldn't open the bottle. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my love life is so pathetic that when I got a sample of cologne in the mail, I kept sniffing it just to remind myself what a guy smells like. FML
Today, I found a mysterious container in the back of my fridge. I opened it to try and figure out what it was. I still don't know what it was, but now my entire flat smells like it. FML
Today, I discovered I'm allergic to the new perfume I bought and now I smell like a hospital. FML
Today, I showered with my favorite soaps, and I used my favorite perfumes and lotions too. I layered my scents to get a nice fruity, girly scent, which helps boosts my confidence. My husband walked in the bedroom when I was done and said that it smelled like cheesy garlic bread. FML
Today, I have a cold. Trying to clear out my stuffy nose, I tried putting mouthwash in my nose. Thinking it was an awesome idea, I put some more in. I then starting screaming in pain due to the extreme burning in my nostrils. FML
Today, I burned my nose. How? I tried sniffing a lit candle. FML
Today, I realized that I'd run out of deodorant. On top of that, I was late to work so I had to run, making me all sweaty and smelly. To cover it up, I used the air-freshener in the toilet at work. Everyone recognized the "Lemon Tree" scent and now all of my colleagues think I'm a cheap bastard. FML
Today, something smelled absolutely disgusting in the bathroom. Like cow shit and stinky beetles. I started sniffing around, because whatever it was, I had to find it and clean it up. That, however, proved difficult, because it turned out that smell was coming from the new soap my mom had bought. FML
Today, I bought an automatic air refresher. I put the can and batteries in, and it promptly sprayed a blast of its scent down my throat. Now I can't breathe without tasting it. FML
Today, I looked up 8 videos, questioned my entire existence, actually hurt myself, and cried profusely trying to open a bottle of wine. Just in case anyone thought I was smart. FML
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Top comments
david66_fml 20
Kinda curious as to why sniffing orange oil would cheer you up
ColonelCusswords 24
Use hammer. hammer open thing good. hammer open thing best.
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Comments (57)
ShedowKun 2
wow
beeferjay 34
you have to push down and twist, like you're giving a titty twister/whistle
PoisonKangaroo 5
Then you lose but almost beat your high score. So you are even more depressed.
Chilled_Rambo 11
Bottles are tricky little ***** sometimes but don't worry OP, you can do anything you set your mind to. Just gotta work hard to get those goals!
paigexox0 37
You should colouring, like the OP in a previous FML. But real colouring books work a lot better :)
exoticwaved 9
Use cocaine.
moodyreallyrocks 27
So sorry OP. Hope you feel better soon..
rookworst 24
Drink a cup of tea, that will make you feel better!
person6641 6
Jasmine tea always cheers me up the most. Just sit down and sip with a really epic book??
Fairyjoshy 13
Tea is good. Tea makes me feel better about myself. Especially hot tea.
SecundusSecunda 27
I,too, feel like that sometimes Even more with the pressure of premedicine What usually works for me is taking a step back, as they say, and watching a show on Netflix I enjoy Perhaps this might work for you also, OP
ZoroMiHawk 25
Smash the damn bottle and use it as a life lesson. There are ALWAYS alternative ways to get what you really want. You just have to take the initiative and make the effort to achieve your goals.
Fairyjoshy 13
Yes, smashing open the bottle so that broken glass/plastic and oil is everywhere, thus wasting the entire bottle of oil, and probably staining whatever is nearby is a FANTASTIC idea. This is sarcasm.