Today, I fainted for the first time in my life. I was in the shower. With my girlfriend. Apparently, my brain and my erection had a battle for who got the most blood, and my erection won. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, I got up to get some water. When I stood up, I fell straight to the ground, my legs were so weak. As I fell, I hit my head on the end table and knocked myself unconscious. My boyfriend laughed at me. FML
Today, I passed out in the shower with my boyfriend. He just left me there. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and steamy in the shower, until I slipped and fell backwards into the shower curtain, which caused me to hit the back of my head on the toilet seat, and the bar of the shower curtain to land on my throat. FML
Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML
Today, my boyfriend was in the shower, and I decided to go join him. I took all my clothes off and stepped into the bathroom. I slipped on some water, and ended up hitting my head on the toilet and passing out. When I came to, I saw my boyfriend's dad looking over me in his towel. Wrong person. FML
Today, while showering I slipped and fell, taking down the shower curtain and smashing my head against the floor, resulting in a concussion. My family came running because of the noise and I lay naked, bleeding and concussed for few minutes before they could stop laughing enough to get me help. FML
Today, we tried to have sex for the first time but I got so excited my blood pressure shot up and I got a nosebleed that didn't fully stop for nearly 30 minutes. Then when we tried again she accidentally headbutted me. The new bleeding still hasn't stopped and I'm feeling very lightheaded. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a shower together for the first time. He was trying impress me and did some sort of dance move, he slipped, and when he fell he kicked my leg out causing me to fall and hit my face on the faucet. FML
Today, I fainted in my bathroom, full on naked and sprawled out on my bathroom floor. When I came to, I was in pain from landing on my side and very disoriented. I sat up and could see my husband just roll over in bed and go to sleep. He didn’t even ask me if I was OK. FML
Today, I flicked the bean so hard I fainted. I was in the shower and ended up coming to a few seconds later. I’m now too traumatized to use my vibrator. FML
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Top comments
ScaryyMary 14
You must have a super-dick. Talk about thinking with the brain below the belt... Yeah, sorry, not funny. I seem to be made of fail today. :(
perdix 31
Nice cover-up! So, really, chief, what scares you more? **** or vaginas? I'm betting it's your girlfriend's hairy muff that brought you down.
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Comments (77)
movies12 0
Wow!!
Jonr1138 6
This is a good example of what FML should be. Very few fml's actually make me lol but this one did and probably always will.
BunnyDrastic 0
damn dude was it awkward havin ur doctor explain that to u ha!
DeJahVu 0
your gf must be quite the looker, or the complete opposite to make you faint.
DynamicDave 11
Haha this reminds me of the seinfeld episode where jerry's penis and his brain play chess lol. You, sir, win for having such a hot girlfriend!
stupiddumbblonde 0
Hahaahhaha this did make me Lol. :D Win.
redshortsx 0
you don't even have enough blood to get it up and still be conscious? you are pathetic.
MayaTheBee_fml 10
How is he pathetic? By saying that he's pathetic, you're saying that it's his fault his body was biologically made like that... *raises eyebrow*
axelkg 0
no. this is such a lie. for that to happen, your penis would have to be atleast 21 inches long, which I guarantee it isn't.
MayaTheBee_fml 10
Or he has anemia, you don't know
omghehehe 0
Really?? If so, you must have a substantial piece of meat between your legs worthy of some **** king!! But then again, I kind of have a hard believing this was your 1st erection ever. Hmmm... Care to elaborate? :)
steph87_fml 0
first faint he said. not erection.
TheWaaaaambulanc 0
20 bucks says he saw the girls hairy ****. Blehhh