Today, I did a sprint in gym class. Despite being the skinniest in the class, I ran slower than everyone else, including two morbidly obese people. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ran the mile in gym class. I was the second to last person to finish, and I was left panting and feeling faint. When the teacher found out I hadn't come in dead last, he accused me of skipping a lap and is now making me rerun the entire thing. FML
Today, I was running the 100m sprint in a track meet. Me and another girl were tied for dead last. When we finished, she complained, "It's so embarrassing how slow I am today. I have shin splints. What happened to you?" I was actually running my hardest. FML
Today, my entire gym class had to run the 1600 with our coach calling out finishing times. My finishing time was reported as "3 days short of a year." FML
Today, I was trying to exercise more, so I went for a walk. I was quickly overtaken by a middle-aged lady with cankles, carrying heavy shopping bags in each hand. I'm 19, skinny, and apparently very unfit. FML
Today, I picked the treadmill next to an old man so I could feel better about myself. He ran faster and longer than I did. FML
Today, a day after after I took a diet pill, I participated in a sprint test. I shat in my pants. I finished the test but got a bad grade. FML
Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML
Today, I ran a mile for my gym class. While I managed to cut two minutes off my time, a few minutes later I felt dizzy and nauseous, which I thought was because I pushed myself too hard. I collapsed and vomited in front of everyone. Not a single person moved to help me. Not even the teacher. FML
Today, I was at the gym running with intensity on the treadmill. As I was working out, I noticed a few guys behind me staring at me. I figured they were checking me out because I was losing some weight and looking better. Turns out they were betting on how much longer "Fat Ass" could last. FML
Today, I told my gym trainer I’d do anything to get in shape. He challenged me to run a mile without stopping. I agreed, then got winded halfway through and dramatically collapsed on the track. A 70 year-oldish woman jogged past me and said, “You’ll live.” FML
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Top comments
tarabella 7
Being skinny doesn't mean that you're a picture of health and automatically fit as hell. And being fat doesn't equal being totally unhealthy and unfit.
ojosRojos 28
Speaking as a fellow thin person, that has nothing to do with how fit you are. If you wanna run faster, you still have to train your body to do so. I’ve never been particularly athletic, but I’m fine with that. Don’t knock on other people because they’re bigger than you - they’re obviously putting in more work than you.
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Comments (21)
ARISKomuniszt 24
This was my childhood
badrussian79 10
Fat/skinny has more to do with diet and dumb luck. fit is more a function of activity level to a point.
PenguinPal3017 19
I was the skinniest kid and also the fastest. I didn't exercise, I spent most of my time watching tv or playing video games, but I was the fastest 13 year old in my city. I was well into puberty though and all the testosterone helped.
KittyMack 13
Do they not teach school kids what muscle tissue is anymore? OP, it's that gross bulky layer you see on pro athletes, Olympic competitors etc. As well as firemen, builders, and others with physical jobs. It's used for movement. Since you seem fixated on achieving extreme scrawniness, OF ******* COURSE you don't move efficiently!!! Why on earth would you expect a powerful body when you CHOOSE to be weak? You should change your priorities and work to grow a sturdy, healthy, capable body, rather than a small, useless, sickly one.
lucidinferno 12
Skinny does not equal fit. Get in shape OP