Today, I checked in a group of men from Mexico. I speak just enough Spanish to realize they're discussing my breasts. I have to stand there smiling while checking in three more people. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at a mall. A woman stopped by me, said slowly and loudly, in Spanish "baño?" Knowing a bit of Spanish, I nodded and pointed the restrooms out for her. She then mutters about "dang Mexicans and their inability to speak English". I'm not even Latina. I'm Irish-American. FML
Today, I was in India. At the airport, the men and women were being searched separately. The guy welcoming us pointed me towards the women's area. I had to explain to him that I was a guy. It took 15 minutes. FML
Today, I was at my favorite Mexican restaurant when I realized my really cute waiter, along with his buddies kept looking at me and smiling. Trying to be cool, I took a bite of my burrito, choked, and spilled ground beef down my new shirt and in my bra. They laughed the whole time. FML
Today, I gave a presentation to a group of international clients. Wanting to impress them, I tried to say "Thank you" in their language, which I thought was Portuguese. Turns out, I was speaking Spanish to a room full of French Canadians. Their confused faces were priceless. FML
Today, my sister told me about her upcoming trip to Mexico. I asked her how she was going to do anything without knowing any Spanish. She told me she's "just going to read their lips". FML
Today, I introduced my Spanish friend to a girl I've had a crush on for a long time. Because he only spoke Spanish and she only spoke English, I was the translator. The first thing he said to her was, "You are really pretty." I translated it as "I like other men." Later, they found out. FML
Today, a customer came in who only spoke Spanish. I speak Spanish rather well so I helped the customer. She ended up buying $2300 worth of stuff. I got written up because not speaking English apparently "has the potential be offensive to other customers if they are not able to understand you." FML
Today, I had to repeat my order in Starbucks three times because the barista was staring at my chest. FML
Today, I was taking the metro into DC for my internship. Two guys came in and started talking to each other in Arabic. One boy turned to the other said "Do you think shes cute?" The other responded "Her face is hideous but she has nice tits." I am fluent in Arabic. They were looking at me. FML
Today, I went to the gym that I just became a member of, making an extra effort to look good because I've heard there are hot guys there. The lady at the front desk said they need to take my picture, then took a second look and said, "Don't worry hun, we'll take it when you're more prepared." FML
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Top comments
gabydoodle 0
You should've said something to them in Spanish. Even just like "enjoy your stay" or something so they get the hint that you could understand them.
morbidsweet 0
Lmao, well hey, at least you have nice **** =]
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Comments (46)
firepowahhx90 0
Now I'm not saying I'm gay, but I can't stand ****.
Unregistered 0
Wow! your life is totally over somebody was checking you out! ! ! ! ! How will you go on living? Maybe you should go sign in to a Eye Rape Clinic since obviously those men visually assaulted you by staring at your breasts. Hmmmm I wonder if there was an fml with 3 spanish woman talking about a guys nice ass. . . I wonder how the fem-nazi's would respond to that
greeneye_fml 12
Get laid, #1. You're obviously frustrated.
fckaduck 0
You should have just called them out on it and embarrassed them. *this wasn't supposed to be a reply.
CatPasswd 9
you know how we know you're gay?
morbidsweet 0
Lmao, well hey, at least you have nice **** =]
No_fyl_cuz_ydi 0
who cares guys talk about boobs in any language get over it
gabydoodle 0
You should've said something to them in Spanish. Even just like "enjoy your stay" or something so they get the hint that you could understand them.
kisseshugsdrugs 5
YES! this is exactly what i was going to say. i speak a few different languages enough to understand what people are saying, and i absolutely love to hear people talking about me thinking i wont understand..then i just respond back to them in their language with a big smile on my face. the look on their face is always priceless.
0___0 9
Should have crossed your arms to cover your **** and give them the mean "look" so they would know you understood them. ;)
VD007 0
YDI for having fine rack, ma'am.
wickedsmart 0
You should have took off. Your clothes and rolled on the floor. Then ********** till you cum and let them all stick their Mexican dicks in you
aero_fml 0
Oh the youth of today..
jarrettd 27
Not wicked smart.
yowzerz 5
You didn't have to stand there and smile, at least one of them had to know english, so even if you couldn't say in spanish, "I know you're talking about my ****, stop or I'll have you thrown out," you could definitely say it in english.
FlaminYawn 0
guys are drawn to balls and anything bouncy. If we can't find a ball, we'll roll up socks into a ball and play with that...
echolot 0
Simple solution: "¡Hablo español!"
Ligerie 0
Thats what I was thinking, if she knew enough to realize what they were talking about she knew enough to tell them to stop.