Today, I came home to my wife crying. She had mixed up our newborn twin girls and couldn't tell which was which. I looked at the girls. Neither could I. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got home after working 14 hours completely exhausted and found my wife asleep, after not sleeping for at least 4 nights with our newborn. She woke up and couldn’t remember where she'd left the baby. After a mad panic, she remembered that he's with her mother. We are not coping very well. FML
Today, I drove to the hospital to see my newborn. I went to the room, picked him out of the crate and held him. Then I heard the toilet flush and saw a woman who I didn't know come out. She screamed. My wife was in the room next door. FML
Today, I went to the hospital in labor expecting a baby boy. I ended the day with identical twins, a baffled doctor, and a husband convinced that our sons can clone themselves. FML
Today, I saw my girlfriend at the store and joyfully greeted her. She got really mad at me - it was her identical twin sister, who I still cannot tell apart from my girlfriend. We've been dating for three years. FML
Today, I found out wife has two baby daddies for our two kids. I’m neither one’s baby daddy. FML
Today, after I had a miscarriage in December, and finding out in June that I was 13 weeks pregnant with twins, I was told out that Baby B had consumed Baby A. FML
Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML
Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML
Today, I was told by my wife that we were going to be parents. We are both females. FML
Today, I picked up my daughter from daycare. As we were getting into the car, I strapped her into the car seat, but something felt off. I looked back and realized I had picked up the wrong kid. In my defense, she was wearing the same jacket as my daughter. FML
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Top comments
NicoleIsCrazy 0
That REALLY SUCKS!
sourgirl101 29
Foot prints records.
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Comments (276)
briiana012 3
ohh u guys ****** up nice parenting skills bro
Zoid27 0
So? just go on like nothing happened.
banananut 0
hahahaha! that's horrible! fyl
succubusprime 0
that's why you physically scar the one you like less. you'll always know which is which, even at bath time.
Quest_ 13
Did they shit in your eyes in resentment? You also should have shat in their eyes in resentment.
johnnyexpl0sion 0
wtf is up with your shit fetish? lol
Quest_ 13
I think it's neat.
RedPillSucks 33
Well, I've got some shit for you, Quest... Some goooood shit.
craphappened 4
There's no point differentiating between the two of them, you'd still get confused anyway, as they grow up.
RedPillSucks 33
Well, once they've got the barcode tattoo on the back of their necks, they wont be able to play switch-a-roo games with their parents when their older.
sommernatsandkas 0
You're from Singapore. Don't all Asian babies look the same anyway? How do you know they are even your twins? Could have been a mix up at the hospital. Epic fail.
DineshKarthikesu 0
dumb much?
Anaxes 5
#77 - I know, right? People like you are the bane of society, incapable of understanding simple sarcasm.
hipar 0
Oh no! That sucks so hard, fyl, indeed! Hope you figure it out soon, tho.
Horde 8
#23: that makes two of us :] OP: translate their name to bar-code and tattoo it on them :D
joanjett 0
OP I am so sorry for you! look at the birth certificates, there may be a birth mark or freckle or something that you can tell them apart by.