Divorce?
Today, I came home and caught my husband in a compromising position. He was watching Twilight. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Stuck in the past
Today, I found out my boyfriend still writes Twilight fan fiction. FML
I_dislike_Twilight
United States
Today, my wife showed me what was missing in our marriage with a Twilight video montage. FML
fiftyno
Tacoma, United States
Today, I came home to my wife practising biting her lip in the mirror. Fuck you, Fifty Shades of Grey. FML
boblaj
Hastings, United Kingdom
Today, I took the day off work to be with my wife, since she's always bemoaning my lack of romantic gestures. As thanks, she spent most of the day reading Fifty Shades of Grey, which is basically a blatant plagiarism of Twilight, starring a pair of two-dimensional BDSM freaks. FML
twihard
United States
Team none of them
Today, I lost a bet with friends and now have to sit and watch all the Twilight movies. FML
ChopSuey
West Monroe, United States
Today, my husband returned from being away for two weeks. I eagerly got myself ready and sent him a risqué picture so he would come to bed. An hour later, he's on the couch playing Xbox with the message already seen. FML
Anonymous
Blacksburg, United States
Red flag
Today, I caught my husband of 13 years looking at other women in Instagram. FML
MyLife
Today, my husband decided to start seeing other people. I found out when I called and interrupted his date. FML
Anonymous
Edison, United States
Surveillance state
Today, I was watching our home security cameras from work when I saw my husband get home and grab a beer. I activated the camera microphone and told him to put it back and fold the laundry. He flipped off the camera, chugged the beer, and started jacking off on the living room sofa. FML
lily
United States
Disinterested
Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I slightly opened my eyes during it and saw him with his eyes wide open, watching TV. FML
Top comments
afallingstar 22
Revoke his man card immediately.
Ray_of_midnight 23
Look at it this way: you now have blackmail material you can hold over him forever.
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Comments (37)
Ray_of_midnight 23
Look at it this way: you now have blackmail material you can hold over him forever.
heavenlyassbutt 11
Lol I have words. Fifty shades would actually be better; at least you could have kinky fuckery to look forward to. Twilight? That's just **********. Yuck yuck yuck!
Glowworm56 27
What about necrophilia? Edward is technically undead.
heavenlyassbutt 11
Yep. Thanks I forgot about that, double yuck.
readingrachel 9
Divorce
Mary Auman 9
think positive. it could have been magic Mike.
appletreee 30
I think you know what you need to do, OP.
Druu 53
I think what everyone seems to be missing is the unsaid implication: 1) He was in a compromising position; and 2) he was watching Twilight. The compromising position isn't that he was watching Twilight. To be more blunt, he was playing with his sparkly stake to either a vampire or werewolf. Or Bella.
Ashamed_Sister 60
I don't think that your interpretation is correct. Not only in my humble opinion but the opinions of many of my friends the mere fact that he watched Twillight is a much more compromising position than an act of masturbation could ever be. Just think about this: A seemingly adult male and Twillight do not fit together. Period.
Therebepeople 13
it all depends if he is team Edward or team jacob...
RichardPencil 32
Were his pants still on?
Robert Andrew 10
Define compromising position? You gave us such a small amount of info to go on here and my imagination is running wild. I mean you A. Caught he masturbating with a donut B. Moving a shampoo bottle up his ass at a medium pace C. Performing a circle jerk by himself D. Shaving his scrotal hairs with your epilady You see my problem here.
olga_crvjl 19
Lmao omg