Today, I came home after a long day at work, and decided to tidy up a bit before finally settling down to relax. I went to take the garbage out, when the bag split and out fell the trash along with hundreds of tiny red ants. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom told me to take out the trash. I thought it would be a good idea to Hulk-smash it into the can. I missed. The bag ripped and garbage flew everywhere. FML
Today, after a long and exhausting day at work, I had no energy to do much of anything, so with that in mind, I got Arby's on the way home. When I did get home and was trying to carry the bag inside, it ripped open and spilled my food all over the driveway. FML
Today, I found a horde of ants in one of my socks when I put it on my foot. FML
Today, I went to take a shower. When I turned it on, no water came out. Only ants. FML
Today, I sat down on my couch with a nice cool beer after a tough day at work. I tried opening a bag of chips. The bag exploded, covering me in chips and crumbs, turning me into a sticky human nacho. Well, my dog certainly saw me as a snack, and I had to shower and change clothes. So much for relaxing. FML
Today, I opened my blinds to see the front yard littered with trash. My neighbor's cat ripped our trash bags open and smeared them all over the lawn. Since it was my turn to take out the trash this week, my family decided I would be the one cleaning up too. FML
Today, I got up, curtains still closed, and in the dim light noticed something dark on the floor, which wasn’t there yesterday. I turned on the light to find out what it was. A tiny ant hill. FML
Today, I went to throw out the garbage outside. I noticed at the bottom of my can was a lot of rice. I was angry at my brother for making a mess. As I went to clean it up, the rice moved. It wasn't rice, it was maggots. FML
Today, I came home to find that maggots had taken over my garbage can this weekend. We weren't home to catch it, and I didn't use the garbage this morning. On top of that, I hadn't had my caffeine for the day because I ran out and forgot. FML
Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML
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Top comments
jgmarines 4
Kill them with fire
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Ant that the worst! Don't let it bug you too much.
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Comments (55)
jgmarines 4
Kill them with fire
thweakmn 3
Bro, they're already fire ants
colby6666 43
Run.
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Ant that the worst! Don't let it bug you too much.
scarletclaw 11
Don't get mad get Glad!
TheCerealKiller 24
Could be worse. For instance, it could be a bunch of spiders.
Sports_guy3 28
That you had almost swallowed.
RenoTheRhino 30
Or hundreds of baby centipedes....Oh..god.
BubbleGrunge 18
Roaches??
purrypie 9
Hi, I'd like to leave the planet please. Yes this happened after you suggested that
Zaros_fml 24
Nopenopenope.
ohSNAPyall 27
Apparently your trash is infested with red ants. Spiders would keep your home biter-free.
fucMyLifeSoHard 18
5- Do you often find yourself eating your trash?
Puffgurl 6
But spiders bite
Not_Impressed13 9
#33 - #5 was trying to tie into a previous FML...
jsni2132 18
Reading that left me *puts on sunglasses* splitting at the sides
Zaros_fml 24
I want to hate you, but I can't.
TourettesGuyFTW 26
**All you need is love**
wardo 4
Shut the **** up
autinyork 6
Spray them with a hose and then get shrunken down by them to only realize how hard the work. WHOOP ANT BULLYYYYYYY
iLike2Teabag 27
What are you smoking?
animalxcrackers 20
Jeez, how long had you left it there?
zoepie 7
Nuke the neighborhood, you might be safe then.
Bumblebrea99 14
Next time you should double bag! :P
TourettesGuyFTW 26
I read that last part as douche bag...
RenoTheRhino 30
Vacuum time.
zoegirl_455 30
Time to get a new house!