Today, I came home after a long day at work, and decided to tidy up a bit before finally settling down to relax. I went to take the garbage out, when the bag split and out fell the trash along with hundreds of tiny red ants. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom told me to take out the trash. I thought it would be a good idea to Hulk-smash it into the can. I missed. The bag ripped and garbage flew everywhere. FML
Today, after a long and exhausting day at work, I had no energy to do much of anything, so with that in mind, I got Arby's on the way home. When I did get home and was trying to carry the bag inside, it ripped open and spilled my food all over the driveway. FML
Today, I found a horde of ants in one of my socks when I put it on my foot. FML
Today, I went to take a shower. When I turned it on, no water came out. Only ants. FML
Today, I sat down on my couch with a nice cool beer after a tough day at work. I tried opening a bag of chips. The bag exploded, covering me in chips and crumbs, turning me into a sticky human nacho. Well, my dog certainly saw me as a snack, and I had to shower and change clothes. So much for relaxing. FML
Today, I opened my blinds to see the front yard littered with trash. My neighbor's cat ripped our trash bags open and smeared them all over the lawn. Since it was my turn to take out the trash this week, my family decided I would be the one cleaning up too. FML
Today, I got up, curtains still closed, and in the dim light noticed something dark on the floor, which wasn’t there yesterday. I turned on the light to find out what it was. A tiny ant hill. FML
Today, I went to throw out the garbage outside. I noticed at the bottom of my can was a lot of rice. I was angry at my brother for making a mess. As I went to clean it up, the rice moved. It wasn't rice, it was maggots. FML
Today, I came home to find that maggots had taken over my garbage can this weekend. We weren't home to catch it, and I didn't use the garbage this morning. On top of that, I hadn't had my caffeine for the day because I ran out and forgot. FML
Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
jgmarines 4
Kill them with fire
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Ant that the worst! Don't let it bug you too much.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (55)
IxEaTxZoMBieZ 7
should've used...HEFTY HEFTY HEFTY
Embyr 8
Still better than spiders. Anything's better than spiders.
itzjstnx 18
call the exterminator!! lol
davincidasecond 24
Seems like you just cAN'T catch a break today. Sorry, I had to. :)
Sappy_tree 7
At least they weren't fire ants...
thepelvicwoo 8
Those suckers are the worst!! Use hydrogen peroxide and triple antibiotic ointment if you got bit. Works for me!
fatkidfalling 11
It's your fault for putting exposed rotting food in the garbage
Not_Impressed13 9
Where the **** else would you put it??
justinlnelson 1
This is the stupidest NFL I've ever seen.