fmyhabit
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I accidentally pocket dialed my sister while I was masturbating. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, while I was getting it on with my girlfriend I accidentally called out "Mom" instead of her name. FML
Shrekkk
🌶️ Spicy
Surprise !
Today, I accidentally connected my phone to my mum's headphones while watching porn. FML
Anonymous
London, United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I walked in on my sister shoving her vibrating phone into her privates. Can't erase that image. FML
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
How very dare you?
Today, I came home from work and found my sister using my vibrator in my own bed. FML
John
Ottawa, Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my little sister decided it would be funny to hide in the washroom closet while I was taking a piss. I wasn't pissing, I was wanking. FML
Anonymous
Littleton, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my 14-year-old sister came into the bathroom while I was in it. When she saw me, she said sorry and left. Little did I know, she took my electric toothbrush to masturbate. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, while making love to my boyfriend, my sister called my cell phone. Not wanting to face the consequences of not answering, I had a long conversation with her. My boyfriend kept going. FML
Anonymous
Gainesville, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend slept with my sister. "Accidentally", apparently. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Concerning
Today, during sex I wasn’t really into it so I was letting my mind wander and it randomly settled on my sister's birthday and how I needed to buy a gift. As my husband seemed like he was about to finish, I faked my orgasm and accidentally moaned my sister's name. He heard me, so now he’s "concerned". FML
stupid me
Israel
Freudian slip
Today, while hugging my sister's husband, I accidentally let out a "Mmm…" sound in front my whole family. FML
Top comments
chewbacca69 0
don't lie you just wanted to hear her voice
Bekll 31
YDI for having the phone that close to you... unless you were using it? Had it on vibrate?
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Comments (192)
mariazzz 5
LMAO
randomlettrrs 8
he was doing something with an ass...
bigblue95 0
so she didnt hang up...
seanders 10
Dinner should be fun.:p
Andrea87_fml 3
lmao!!
NathanPS 14
Andrea nice ****.
KleenexWaffle 3
Nathan nice compliment. You should use that one next time you're at the club. See how far it gets you. And make sure you don't accidentally pocket dial while rubbing the trouser snake to FML profile pictures.
jrsgreenfire257 0
Andreas post # is the same as her number in her name :9 AND NICE TITSSS
shoecrazy 5
dwl
seanders 10
95,91 you're both ******* losers. you should suck each other in a homoerotic 69 so you get head at least once before you die.
noobgang7 5
YDI for masturbating to mobile ****.
knightrider2993 7
I hope she didnt try to seduce him after he was done that would have been sad lol
BCCUBS09 0
damn ur hot
arianylas 3
Sounds more like a FHL to me... "Today, my brother butt-dialed me while masturbating..." Yeah, that sounds worse to me.
Loketiazo 0
Hah, k fallo!!! Epic!!!
Myrenhi 0
I agree with 129 D:
kgraham21 0
Hhahahah, that sucks! I've pocket dialed my mom when I told her I was with a friend and I was with other people smoking a blunt hahahah. I feel your pain sorta.
staceysgenesis16 0
yumm .. thatsounds fun , im sure there wont be awkward being within a 3 feet radius of her .. hmm
DumDum999 0
LMAO
Th3_Ging3R 1
lol sam here ...but i noticed before she figurd it out muhaha
marissabunge23 0
#1 what's up with your picture..looks like ur in a shower...?
spartanfan68 0
I love your pick
chewbacca69 0
don't lie you just wanted to hear her voice
MrGold 0
Wincest!
Haydenob 0
hahahaha
SchiTzenGiglez 0
lololololololololol
Yousuck24 21
Incest much?
mollyslips 13
gross, have you HEARD his sisters voice lately? ;O
girlpenguin 0
bet she thought that was hot!
sarah48_fml 0
wincest!
Jrefinne 7
You never know, those Mormons are a strange people...
TheDrifter 24
That's why nobody in Utah will marry a virgin. "If she's not good enough for her family she's not good enough for ours. "
ImaWiseGuy 5
13, nicely put.....
OrgasmicBunnies 9
ah, the good ol' Mormons. What would we do without them?
DaySetsFire 2
smart smart smart smart smart. not dumb dumb dumb dumb
ImThePope 2
All of your views on Mormons are horribly wrong -_-
seanders 10
79: How the **** would you know? You're the damn pope, thus Catholic
OrgasmicBunnies 9
ok polygamy is bad, but How can you not live guys with magical hats ; ~ ; wiizzaaarrrdddsss
ImThePope 2
Because I'm Mormon you dipshit. it's a screen name I've always used, shut the **** up, like your screen name HAS to mean anything important. What would you have said if my screen name is ImThePresident? Nothing different I assume. It's a dumb name people use, so chill -_-
iLaurie 0
74- I love you and your South Park reference.
GamerGuy00 0
What the he'll are you talking about a magic hat idiot! I have never heard of that before, if you don't want to believe the truth fine! Just quit making up crap stories to make you feel better!!!
deadshadow_fml 0
Hahahahaha ****** Mormons xD I say as I smoke a cig. I would never be able to follow a religion made up by a cattle theif (yes Joseph was a cattle theif)
SchiTzenGiglez 0
Thirteen witnesses, magic hats, and cattle molestation? Sounds like a satanic conspiracy.
Lovezoohey 4
I'm a Mormon, and proud to be one too. But it appears to me that you dont know ANYTHING 'bout the LDS religion, so I'm going to kindly ask you to not talk if you dont know anything bout us, because it's pretty obvious that you don't!
013 1
144- I like how you cuss yet Mormons arn't suppose to lol
Bekll 31
YDI for having the phone that close to you... unless you were using it? Had it on vibrate?
MrGold 0
Oh he had it on vibrate all right. Vibrate on the highest setting.
UnicornHooker 0
Like a self-employed Birmingham Booty Call...
Bano360 25
He pocket dialed her, so it was in his pocket. I don't know about you, but I keep my phone in my pocket when I'm not using it.
Bekll 31
Not while masturbating. Why wear pants/shorts anyway... nudity all the way! :p
DjeePee 25
**** your sister's life. She must have got a nice disturbing mental picture of you.
dolphincheddar 10
nahh. she was probably pleasuring herself on the other end
OrgasmicBunnies 9
it's only a fhl if he was awkwardly moaning her name.
Juliaa15 6
You know, I thought this was a YDI, but it doesn't sound like she hung up....
mariazzz 5
Omg LOL
babymaee 0
that's true :o
christian50 0
win
iZacheria 0
Well, OP, just be thankful it wasn't an iPhone 4 and called her on FaceTime....if it was, oh my god **** both of your lives.
JustinThunder 8
Then it'd just be twice as funny!
Lunaa94 6
I'd be more thankful for the fact that iPhones don't pocket dial :)
manda_baby_rawr 4
you would be surprised what evil things iPhones can do. never doubt them!
Lunaa94 6
Most evil thing my iPhone has ever done is autocorrect "*******" to "ducking".
k3500 0
lol
Sadieladean 0
actually iPhones do pocket dial.... I've done it several times ~_~ also been pocket dialed from one too
awesomemarcus 0
reading this on my iphone4
LiveThenDie 2
My dad's iPhone pocket dials... it's possessed.
porridge111 6
your comment did make me laugh, but still, his phone was in his pocket
MrGold 0
Funny thing is I know you do it constantly. **** your habit indeed.
anniejinx24 11
oh pleaaase, everyone masturbates, get over it.
SuperNinjaa 0
how could you pocket dial her if you had no pockets
lowloudflush 2
it took way too many comments before someone pointed this out..
TheElBurrrito 21
agreed
jordizzle1496 0
you don't have to ********** naked
zzzBOLTzzz 1
^ This. I simply open my zipper, bring out my gun, and play with it until it start shooting. :p
dannilozon 0
exactly what I thought!!!
Miss_Michaela 10
Could have been worse. Could've been your Grandma. We've all seen that movie!
alfredo1177 0
haha American Pie?!? lmao
1greatsk8er 0
hahahahahahahahahaha best part of the whole movie