Today, during an interview, I was given a list of items and asked which items I would take to a deserted island. When I chose a Bible, the interviewer asked why. I replied, "So I can burn it." What I meant to say was, "So I can use it to start a fire if the trees on the island bear fruit." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after months of unemployment, I got an interview. It went great until the recruiter asked if I had questions. Trying to sound thoughtful, I asked, "What do employees dislike most about working here?" The recruiter laughed and said, "That's a unique way to phrase that." I spent the rest of the interview wondering why my brain chose violence at the worst possible moment. FML
Today, I went to a job interview and had a brilliant answer prepared for a common job interview question, but as soon as the interviewer asked what my main qualities were, my mind went blank and I blurted out, "I like turtles." FML
Today, while playing with a lighter, I jokingly told my boyfriend I would burn his mustache off. He responded by telling me he would burn off mine. FML
Today, I thought it would be fun to climb a tree. My older sister also thought it would be fun to set the tree on fire. FML
Today, I had a job interview that I really wanted to nail. Everything was great until the interviewer asked me why I left my last job. I meant to say, "I felt it was time for a new challenge," but instead I said, "I felt tired of pretending to care." The look on their face was priceless. Needless to say, but I don't think I'll get the job. FML
Today, my shirt caught on fire when I was burning paper for my ancestors at the cemetery. FML
Today, my boss told me to not burn the place down while she was outside. When she came back inside, I accidentally started a fire. FML
Today, during a job interview, the interviewer asked me to “describe a time I overcame a challenge.” My mind went blank. After 10 seconds of silence, I blurted out, “Once, I tried to cancel my gym membership.” FML
Today, I told my fiancé that I don’t believe in God, so I won’t be going to church anymore because I’ll be picking up the Sunday shift at work. I don’t have a fiancé anymore because I’m, “a godless heathen who will burn for eternity.” FML
Today, I went on an interview for a job that I had been wanting for months. I thought everything was going great. On my way out, my interviewer asked me to recycle something for him. I agreed. It was my resume. FML
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Top comments
Sonofaquiche 9
Phrasing, honey, Phrasing...
oreosaretoocool 18
Everyone gets nervous O.P but surely a match or lighter would have been a better answer?
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Comments (47)
Stuffaluffagus 25
But... you don't need to cook fruit
TabooSushi 24
But you also don't want to chop/burn down trees that produce it. Cause then a good food source is gone.
Kaylana_fml 31
That explanation makes even less sense. A book, even a bible, isn't exactly a never-ending source of flammable fuel. That would save the guy all of, what, a few minutes? before he'd have to resort to tree branches and actual wood for fire anyway. Unless he believes in the fires of Hell, in which case maybe I can start making the connection there... Still sacreligious.
Vanderdale 14
the phrasing is awkward but basically they're saying that they would use the bible as fuel for fire instead of the trees on the island if those trees bore fruit, because they'd be a source of food. Not that it'd help much, given that a bible would probably only be good for a few minutes of burning. Also I think if I was trapped on a deserted island, sacrilege would be the least of my concerns.
TheEndIsNigh 10
You would need a fire to kill germs in water (and maybe distill sea water if there's no fresh water). It'd also be good for cooking meat and to keep warm by.
Kaylana_fml 31
Except the OP wasn't on an island, they were answering a hypothetical question during an interview, and if I were trying to get the job, avoiding offensive or taboo subjects, such as sacrilege, would be pretty forefront in my mind. In fact, I would just avoid all religious, political or intimate subjects entirely, as advised by HR personnel and corporate harassment attorneys alike.
pinkuser626 17
Omg thank u to all that explained the fruit bearing tree part I was honestly confused y u would only need a fire if u had a fruit bearing tree ?
Max Gray 2
This doesn't even make any sense. Why would you start a fire if the trees bear fruit? What is bad about fruit, or why would a fire be beneficial? shouldn't you burn the trees if they DON'T bear fruit?
7and7is 20
What a non-clever workaround the wicked illegal question asking a persons religion.
rivenrock 14
I wouldn't worry about it. The interviewer was probably just trying work out if you were taking it because you thought religious worship was important. You've answered that either way. :)
cheshireau 26
I want to know why, exactly, did you choose or name the Bible itself instead of saying a book.
Gaernem 17
Yes! Burn the bible and all the myths.
Ireadfmlonthejohn 2
Job interview? Because bringing up the Bible in ine would be out of sorts for the interviewer.
lilchica22001 22
Wtf kind of interview question is that? And what the heck kind of job are you interviewing for in which being stranded on a deserted island may come up?
Talis99 26
Stuff like that is character-judgement and problem-solving skills questions.
sasquatchius 3
What a stupid question in an interview. You should have answered "I don't know, maybe ask me something relevant to the position? Or if you want to get to know my personality how about we have a regular conversation like regular people?" Questions with no defined good answer like that and others such as "Tell me about yourself" and "What's your biggest weakness?" (when no clarification is given) are a sign that the interviewer isn't professional. So if it makes you feel better since the interviewer was clearly an amateur whoever got it would simply be lucky anyway.
TheEndIsNigh 10
It's the logic behind the decisions that matter, not the answers themselves.