Today, at work, our team started a new sales strategy of selling flowers to men by asking them to buy one for their lovely ladies. The first guy I ask ends up crying and telling me his wife passed away a week ago. The woman with him was actually his sister. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went into work and noticed one of my fellow colleagues had a large bunch of flowers on her desk. As soon as I saw her, I immediately said, "Happy Birthday!" Everyone went quiet. It wasn't her birthday; her father had died. FML
Today, I asked a coworker what she'd bought her dad for father's day. She said that she got him some flowers, and I laughed because I thought it was a rather feminine gift for a man. I later found out that the flowers were for his grave. FML
Today, I got flowers from a secret admirer. Turns out they were from my sister's in-laws who own a flower shop. Apparently, everyone feels bad that I'm single and they are convinced I'm gonna die alone. FML
Today, I bought some flowers. As I was checking out, the cashier asked, "Aww, these for your mom? How sweet." I responded they were for a girl I liked. She laughed and said, "Sorry…" FML
Today, I went to surprise my girlfriend, who was at work at Target, with flowers. I asked the employee at the entrance if she was there. When he asked who I was, his face lit up red and he started profusely apologizing, stating, “She told me you guys broke up.” before guiding me to her area. News to me. FML
Today, at work, I asked a lady how she was doing. When she replied, I didn't understand her, and instead of asking her what she'd said, I just replied with, "Oh, that's good." What she'd said that I didn't understand was that her husband had just died. FML
Today, while at work, I asked an older customer how he was doing. He told me that he'd just lost his wife. I gave my condolences before he clarified that his wife was not dead, but was lost in Walmart. FML
Today, while I was working my shift at the store, my girlfriend appeared and asked to talk to me. Once we were alone, she burst into tears and started sobbing. Turns out someone's dad died in her favorite TV show and she wanted some comfort. FML
Today, my sister asked me how my boyfriend was doing. He died two years ago. She was the first person I told. FML
Today, on a whim, I bought my wife some flowers on my way home. She put them in a vase then asked me what stupid thing I did that I’m pre-apologising for. She refuses to believe I bought her flowers for any other reason. Man, I must be a really shitty husband. FML
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Top comments
allmidnighteyes 11
It's not like you knew. Oh well ¯|(°_o)/¯ Sucks to be him, though.
redbluegreen 41
Roses are red, Violets are blue. This rhyme's overdone, But at least I'm not you.
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Comments (105)
MyMetalRomance 3
YDI. New lesson, dont go up to any man thinking that the lady is their wife or gf.
lajaynay 15
Your logic astounds me. OP should be psychic and know everyone's relationship when they walk in?
Ranimal 12
It's not like you could have known. Should have given him a hug and a flower.
DjeePee 25
I'm sure his sister is a lovely lady too.
Legendslayer222 26
This is where your boss comes in and fires you for upsetting the customers! :0 Tough luck, hope his sister wanted the flowers anyway.
warsha 0
oh noooooo :(... were you able to give him one for free as an excuse??
Lisa_Simpson_fml 5
Try selling them to Cletus and his family, I'm sure you won't have a problem, if you think their sisters are their wives. Bart would have been the first non-relative to marry into their family when he almost had to marry Mary.
Rickilynn1 10
Cletus has millions of children.
MrHomerSimpson 11
Lisa! What are you doing on this website?
geeksaresexy 18
See Lisa, you do make your dad mad sometimes :p
docscientist 10
That's a fairly douche strategy in the first place.
LongHairedHippie 0
I agree!
raboof 4
What a novel strategy.
cupcake83_fml 0
In these moments you don't know what to do...
PandaPi 0
shitty luck :l