Today, at work at a car dealership, a seemingly overzealous customer shook my hand vigorously after we finalized a deal. I didn't think anything of it until a coworker pointed out that he was just trying to make my breasts jiggle. I'm a man. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went into to shake a big wig's hand at work, and he went in for a hug. I couldn't pull my hand away fast enough, so I cupped his entire titty for at least 10 seconds. FML
Today, I was checking out a customer who seemed quite friendly. As I finished, he reached slightly over the counter and I impulsively reached out and shook his hand. He gave me a dumbfounded look and said, "Can I have my change please?" FML
Today, I was chatting with a customer who comes regularly to my job. He sticks his hand out and I put my hand on his, thinking he's giving me a high five. He was just waiting for his receipt. FML
Today, my co-worker came back from Thailand with big new breasts. She told me to go ahead and touch them because they have a funny texture for the first few months. When our GM entered the room, I had both hands down my co-worker's shirt, agreeing that they were unnaturally firm. FML
Today, I got really excited at work over a deal I was about to close. I got up and started performing a rather obscene hip thrust only to notice a client sitting in the glass meeting room. FML
Today, while at work, a customer came up to me, stuck his finger in my armpit, then licked his finger. FML
Today, while working at the bar, I had a beautiful woman squeeze my bicep and tell me I was in amazing shape. Instead of flirting like any normal human being, I awkwardly said, "Thanks…" and then walked away in shame. FML
Today, I fistbumped a cashier as they tried to hand me my change. FML
Today, out of habit, I said "See you later" to a creepy old male customer who stared at my chest the whole time I was serving him. His response was to wink and say, "Oh, you will." FML
Today, trying to be friendly, I said good morning to the creepy guy at work. He responded by wordlessly hugging me. I was touched, until I realized he was trying to unhook my bra. FML
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Top comments
Free4ever 6
Your milkshake brings all the customers to the dealership?
Volcan_fml 22
If you've got it, flaunt it.
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Comments (46)
CrazyManNo9 29
Your coworker is full of shit.
trulymickeyj 13
How is it the coworkers fault? He let him know what had happened..z
Ukeee_X 19
Get a nice bra next time, flash em boy!
viagradoesntwork 7
I cannot believe the rude comment you just made. That is just terrible. I hope your ashamed with yourself
oj101 33
You know what they say... sex sells. Apparently, it has no boundaries.
B0u_fml 18
You're sexy and you didn't know it!
trollburger_fml 4
Boobs or moobs, they still shake, Its something ;-)
perdix 31
It's time to NOT hit the gym! Your ******* are your moneymakers, so don't get rid of them.
asdfghjklana 9
moobs!
VScpu 3
Did you get the sale because if them? Maybe. Maybe...
BlackPhenom 9
Manboobs are makin' you sales. I suggest making strong vigorous handshakes when you first meet your potential customers.
stewpididiot 11
Do you still have your watch ?