Today, as I was getting into work, I saw a co-worker of mine walking in front of me. We're really good friends and we joke around a lot, so I jokingly whistled at him and slapped his butt. Turns out it wasn't my friend, it was the new guy. Hello, sexual harassment charges. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at work, my manager accidentally bumped into me, brushing my behind with the back of his hand. He was a bit embarrassed, so I jokingly said, “You could at least buy me dinner first!” He went to HR and told them I made him uncomfortable. I was just trying to lighten the mood. FML
Today, I got a coworker at my new job in trouble, because he kept harassing me and asking me out, even after I clearly told him I wasn't interested. Turns out he's very popular around here, and everyone now hates me for being a trouble-maker and not "taking a compliment." FML
Today, I met a new guy at work who wouldn't stop hitting on me. We ended up on a six-hour shift together watching a pool, so we were wearing nothing but bathing suits when he began grabbing me inappropriately. When I confided in my female coworker about it, she told me that he was her husband. FML
Today, I was chatting with a new guy at work. He cracked a joke about me and I jokingly gave him a light push on the shoulder. Half a second after I touched him, he threw himself back and hit the floor yelling in "pain". Now I'm suspended because of this psycho. FML
Today, I went into the store where my boyfriend works. I saw him talking to a customer, his back was facing me, so I went up and smacked his butt. Turns out it wasn't him. FML
Today, I've been into this guy at work forever, and we've been flirting more and more lately. Today he came up behind me, but I didn't see him. He said "Hi!" and scared me so bad that I farted. FML
Today, at work I got a message from some dude trying to flirt with me. While I was cracking up and making fun of him with my friends, I get a message from him saying look directly behind you, and there he was staring at me. FML
Today, I visited a friend at work with a couple of other friends. We like to play pranks, so we went to his register and started loudly discussing our masturbation habits as a joke. Some bitch complained, and his boss fired him and kicked us all out. FML
Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML
Today, after many years of being single, I finally worked up the courage to ask my coworker out. He said no and gave me "fair warning" that he's going to report me for sexual harassment. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
"No, I thought you were my friend you see. You have the same kind of butt— Not that I was looking at your butt. It's just from behind... Oh shit."
NyteProwleR 0
Wow what a loser, to file charges for that you'd have to be a real prick.
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Comments (33)
JarJarBinks_fml 0
YDI for slapping another guy's butt
CrackhouseDoug 0
You should sue him back for false charges. After all, he is the new guy and who is everyone going to support?
EMZIIE 0
Oh geez.......
scarletchamber 0
morelike ****
NyteProwleR 0
Wow what a loser, to file charges for that you'd have to be a real prick.
thepowerofone 0
yeah, people are just pansies now-a-days
redshortsx 0
he never saidthe guy actually filed sexual harassment charges against him.I'm sure if he explains he won't sue him
dcea 17
yeah. "pressing charges for sexual misconduct is for losers". you're promoting rape culture.
T1A2Z3 35
Oh my god how dare someone not enjoy sexual assault...
redbluegreen 41
"No, I thought you were my friend you see. You have the same kind of butt— Not that I was looking at your butt. It's just from behind... Oh shit."
inconvienentgurl 0
LMAO!!! n u'd not have to have some kind of proof that you did it... n it was his 1st day...y couldnt he just feel like that was how u welcome ppl around there... u could of just said that ne way.
shamille 5
Welcome to the company! Ready for your initiation? *wink wink*
redbluegreen 41
Work, the new and [somewhat] improved sorority!
tenkenshi 2
LOL, no need to say that much. Just say you thought he was someone else and give him the apologetic butt slap.
JlynnS 11
Classic... I love it..
writergirl69 0
Okay, can anyone here translate #5's message into English?
joblessalex 0
"laughing my ass off"!!!!! and you'd not have to have some kind of proof that you did it? it was his first day. Why couldn't he just feel like that was how you welcome people around here? You could of just said that anyway. Best I could do because it was so choppy. Enjoy!
teentee401 37
^good job
awuh_man 0
this is where I say harrassment lawsuit- like a boss! congrats! :DDDDDD
junjouromantica 0
Yay, for references. Hahaha.
DrAwesome 6
Meet a giant fish!
dyld921 2
I don't want to be called stupid, I just don't like DOING anything stupid. I have nothing against actual people with Down Syndrome but I'm smart and I'd like to keep it that way.
dyld921 2
I'm not afraid of being called retarded, I just don't like DOING anything retarded. I'm not against any actual people with Down syndrome, but I'm smart and I'd like to keep it that way.
redbluegreen 41
**** its brains out! ;D
athiest_pope 0
YDI
Ranoona 0
Thats really funny ;D.
giganticbrain 0
HA! Good gaming unexpected people is always good fun.
DrAwesome 6
YDI for talking to sexual harassment charges.
mister_moops 0
lol.
sublime93 0
Total, total win.
Gargananana 1
I can't believe I laughed at that.
MemoriesOfOblivi 1
Hahaha! DrAwesome! You sure are awesome! I lol'd! :D
kkbabe01xo 0
haha it surprises me that this actually made me laugh XD
cassiljiha 0
I don't think this is real. -.- I've read so many "embarrassing stories" JUST like this. Gah.
missalkali 8
are you honestly saying that you think it's fake because it happens a lot?! it happens to everyone all the time, they see what they think is their friend and greet them however they greet that friend and it turns out to be someone else. I don't believe it's never happened to you!!