Today, after twelve straight hours of work, my fourteen year old son surprised me with a broken window and a cracked TV. He said, "I was swatting away a fly." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my son tried to swat a fly with a hammer. Our apartment walls are now littered with dents and holes. FML
Today, my 15-year-old son got so enraged at a fly that kept harassing him, that he ended up slapping himself in the face as it flew by him. This caused him to fall out of his chair, at which point he broke down into a mess of tears, humiliating me in front of everyone. FML
Today, my son broke a window at school playing football. Not only did he break one, he broke the other window next to it. His excuse? He tried making it look like a bird flew in one way and flew out the other. I have to pay $800 to fix it. FML
Today, my wife asked our 17 year-old son to clean his room. Following up, he lied to his mom and said it was clean. After rechecking his room, he began to throw things and I returned to find holes punched in the walls. I went and patched the holes, after which he immediately kicked more holes. FML
Today, after my 14 year-old son brought home six Fs on his report card, we decided to take away all his video games and sell them. He screamed for hours, then went into the kitchen and started smashing glasses against his head, "until we brought back his games." FML
Today, my 12-year-old son played QWOP on my laptop. Half an hour later, he virtually destroyed it in a fit of rage. FML
Today, my 3-year-old broke his glasses, clogged the toilet with Hot Wheel cars, and covered the whole house with Cheerios. All in a matter of roughly six minutes while I was putting laundry away. FML
Today, my thirteen month old son woke me up at 6AM on my day off, by punching me in the eye. FML
Today, our work computers are down so I've been trying to fix it via my home computer for 3 days. My 12-year-old son took one look at the screen, changed 2 settings on a drop down menu, and the problem was fixed. My 12-year-old is better at my job than I am. FML
Today, my son nearly burned the house down with a lighter and an aerosol. His excuse? He was killing a massive spider carrying an egg sack. My wife hates spiders so she refuses to punish him and gave him £20. But sure, dear old Dad will spend money replacing the wallpaper and curtains, no problem. FML
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Top comments
Fuaaad1994 31
With a hammer?
I_Like_Dogs 28
Yeah, kids these days have no respect for the parents who work hard to get them a nice fly. No, they just swat it away.
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Comments (51)
annas3 10
did he get it?
Sangue0608 26
I was searching the comments to see if anyone has said this. lol I figured they had but hoping not so I could.
simleader 13
Hey, don't be ungrateful. You didn't have to come home after 12 hours of work with a fly circling you!
MidnaLink 35
I would rather have a fly…
ohSNAPyall 27
14 IIIIIIII just wanna fly
samlovesham1234 9
To the down voters that was a Sugar Ray reference.
echarlotte 19
Your kid has a strong arm
SPN_lover666 27
I hope you told him that he is paying for a new TV and a new window.
tormcn 26
He could have at least said spider. That I might understand.
AlysoninAlaska 19
He at least got the fly though, right? Who knows, maybe it was a mutant fly and he really just saved you all from unspeakable danger.
dirty_dan_ 15
Smack him a couple times and say you were swatting a fly
doodlecloud 27
Geez, even if he lacks common sense and didn't realise his strength, surely you stop after you've broken the first expensive item?! FYL.
KatieJBabe 27
But did he get the fly?
PurpleMyth 28
Did he kill it?