Today, after months of believing my marriage has been better than ever, I found out that my husband has been cheating on me with our neighbor. I can't afford to move, and I have to see the fake-titted homewrecker every day. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I found out that my wife has been having an affair with the guy who's been trying to get our relationship back on track. FML
Just dependa things
Today, and since we moved on base, my neighbor’s wife has tried to have an affair with me. I got tired of it and told him. He blew smoke. I found out she’s in a cheating wife’s club, who all defend each other. She proclaimed to all our neighbors that I’m a predator and I'd attacked her. They believe her instead of my wife, who saw everything. FML
Yeah, just blame me!
Today, after I found out my husband cheated on me and then yesterday had to stop him from trying to kill himself, he's now moved out and has decided that this is all my fault. FML
Today, I found out that my 50-year-old ex-husband and the 20-year-old skank he cheated on me with are buying the house next door to me. FML
Deception
Today, I found out my husband was faking his leg injury. I caught him out and about walking just fine, hand in hand with another woman. I’ve been caring for him, holding down the bills, and taking him to an "at home" chiropractor for the past 7 months. FML
Watch the world crumble
Today, I found out that the drop dead gorgeous fun bubbly woman I hit it off with is actually a disgusting, scheming whore who seduces married men, then blackmails them for money. I can’t afford to pay her, nor can I afford my wife to find out. I’m screwed. FML
Today, I found out the love of my life, my husband, is cheating on me. When I confronted him about it, his response was, "Don't blame me, you're the gullible bitch." FML
Today, I found out that the coworker I refused to leave my wife for is now happily married with someone else, while I'm now divorced. FML
To be fair and balanced…
Today, I found out my husband is still friends with someone who talks a lot of crap about me. FML
Bad news
Today, I came to found out that every time my husband told me that he was on "a work trip", he was actually cheating on me with some other bitch. FML
Top comments
nerobluerose 10
Kill them both and burry the bodies in a corn field, no one will find then in a cornfield.
lovepandorasaver 11
Take the house and do things to make her move
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Comments (204)
Athleticism 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Coincidentally piss yourself on the bed and sleep on the couch.
pregnantpianist 2
That's just unsanitary.
MelTheGreat 23
And unnecessary
305Miami 0
Have your dad kick his ass or your older brother (if you have one).
doctorhook86 25
47: She's married, so I'm pretty sure she's not a 14 year old girl.
dcg1375 7
You don't have to afford to move. Kick him out. Take him for half of what he's worth and call it a day. You will probably sell the house in the process and split all the assets....basically, get a lawyer. You have assets to pay for it.
Osito2011 9
125 that is easier said then done. You need money for a lawyer, and prof that op husband had broken there valves and sleep with the woman. Also, Op might have signed a prenuptial agreement before her and her Douche bag of a husband got married. If they did op isn't going to get jack.
MoerGrapeDrank 0
I always found that wrong. You don't take any of the others stuff unless they are children or your ******* poor. Marriage is equal so then during termination you just get your shit back. As long as you do the equal partnership thing right. Nobody gets robbed of anything but children!
Jezlovespink 5
op there are several ways to deal with this 1. kick cheater out 2. you can move into a homeless shelter until you have enough for your own place 3. beat the home-recker until her fake **** bust 4. put a restraining order on both home-recker and cheater 5. if you can't afford the bills by yourself then back to #2 or ask mom and dad/friends if they are around 6. make cheater and ****** life miserable 7. go get waisted 8. go to the club bring a few hot guys home n start an after party ect....ect.....you can always find different ways to get help its ok to party n get drunk sometimes just don't turn to it and make it your life k go have some fun release stress while your going through it ....it doesn't have to be the end of the world....hopefully there are no kids invovled....its a lot harder
red_headforlife 15
#1,and exactly what good would this do? Other then ruining her bed?
eggmarie 25
145: vows* not valves. Just for future reference.
andrew6p 19
Just go pay a hobo or some poor guy a 100$ and he'll do whatever u tell him to do
nerobluerose 10
Kill them both and burry the bodies in a corn field, no one will find then in a cornfield.
alicexo_fml 8
Except a farmer...
nerobluerose 10
Farmers don't dig up deep enough to uproot a grave.
kathuzada 6
Bury them in a dog park
wellfuuucckme 7
What about pet cemetery cause OPs husband is a dog !
wellfuuucckme 7
What about pet cemetery cause OP's husband is a dog!
ProfessionalTrol_fml 14
Human scum. Throw him out with the trash
wellfuuucckme 7
-__________________- excuse the last comment
Rowdey 10
31- Don't flood the comments even more by saying that. Just let it be. We all understand :-)
Zedd_fml 8
31- I ******* love you too.
EMTchic 14
Even better, under a septic tank . No one EVER looks under a septic tank ! Also, *bury
Inheritance 10
Some fathers are overly protective of their daughters, so maybe OPs father is the type that keeps a shotgun on him.
duckyeah 6
Or in a cement block... No one ever looks in cement blocks...
MDTeddy 13
It isn't the husband's fault. It is the neighbor's fault for giving in. I am sure she realizes he is taken and not free to have sexy time.
iliketurdles 7
Well, today I learnt people on FML are experts at getting rid of the body. This may be useful in the future.
thallpma08 4
I just go so many ideas
SherBear133 7
71- it takes two to tango
t765234 10
85- Not if you have schizophraenia.
MizzErikaHart 8
71, its totally the husbands fault. What would the neighbor care if the guy is married or not if she wants to have sex with him? Sure it's kind of wrong but ops husband has the responsibility of being faithful since he married her. The neighbor can have sex with whoever she wants and it's messed up that she chose a married man but ops husband could've said no.
doodlecloud 27
Good god 71, I bet you're the kind of person who blames women for getting raped too. I would hate to be your girlfriend (or actually, any woman close to you).
Zedd_fml 8
66- in NY, building demolition crew found a body buried in a building foundation, came with suspect's DNA, not recommended. Recommend watching Dexter/ Breading bad, good body hiding references.
hunteer9 5
Sink the body, where I live people get drunk and drown and are never seen again. Wrap about thirty feet of chain around him and throw him into a deep lake. The fish and micro organisms will turn him into bones relatively quickly.
cat0720 9
Ask Siri where to bury a body. She knows all.
KingCeltic77 18
I heard Siri sends all things said to her to Apple headquarters. Bad idea.
mootoo31 6
17. yeah, a horndog.
elk21dbm 18
53- I like your icon :)
Meettitan 14
I live in Florida; so every mistake is just a short drive away from the Everglades. Did I mention alligators eat things whole, and digest bone?
ShyAnn29 15
106, as the body decomposes, the gasses it produces will eventually bring the body to the surface, so that may not be the best idea
wannabemom 5
Try a hog farm. Just take off their shoes first. Hogs wont eat the shoes.
RoBi1475 0
Honestly as long as you dont do something as momumentally stupid as bury them in the backyard or brag about your crime, it doesnt matter where you hide the body statistically the majority of bodies that are buried are never found. As long as you keep your mouth shut you should be good.
asinforasin 1
Call Miranda lambert. She'll know what to do. Gunpowder and lead? Country music reference? No? Okay then...
RustlingSoul 26
19, You have no idea what the pet cemetery does to people.
trippythehippy 6
Well at least you know why he was so much more agreeable.... Yea still not cool.
CheeseTron 15
At least you can stretch out your middle finger a little more often.
loserboii 11
Another neighbor getting it from the husband? No pregnancy right¿
lovepandorasaver 11
Take the house and do things to make her move
yankfan89 27
Shit on her porch everyday until she moves.
bballsoccerrocks 7
How is she the home wrecker? What about your husband?
RockinRoyaltyxD 13
A home-wrecker is someone who has an affair with a married man or women. Yes ops husband is a cheating douche-bag but that's what he is a cheater. As for her neighbor she knew op husband was married but had an affair anyway. Thus making her a home-wrecking bitch.
sjdbeinska 4
just pee on everything he loves until he moves out...wait what if he moves in with your neighbor?
gage27 5
You can't hate em till you try them(;
outoftown 27
#7, Try the bacon FML. The turkey thread.
lacespace 8
Is that your motto? Well although your very tempting-with your posted phone number and all-I'd have to say your motto makes me question you, and I'm not willing to bone to test my theory.
berichsoon 11
7- delete your number off your profile, get off FML, grow some balls, go find a nice girl in your high school, then take her to the movies or something. You seem to come here for the wrong reasons.
gage27 5
Y'all are crazy! I have a nice girl... That doesn't mean I don't like fake boobs. I think that's generally liked haha.... And my number is on my profile? Oh thanks for telling me, let me take it off and not talk to anybody like you lifeless Internet addicted *****. I don't come here for the wrong reason. Fun. Like its supposed to be. Obviously you have too much care and respect for this website haha!
smtm2012 6
I hate cheaters. If you're not happy, leave.
PlaySpades 21
OP said she can't afford to move.
bunny911 16
I think 8's comment was more aimed at the cheater than the cheated. Like if you're not happy, leave the person. Don't cheat on them.
gader 3
I would rather to be homeless than living with cheaters one minute though. I'm just saying..
Lacalema 21
The three profile pics above me work together way to well.
MetalOcelot 5
take all his crap and stuff it into her car, then thermite the shit out of it
RentaName 15
I thought you were going to say ****** at first.....
MetalOcelot 5
hahahaha touche good sir or lady, but i think the screams will last longer if her car is melted into a puddle >:) muah hah hahh
xalba 9
I would make her life a living hell until she moved. I know you have to try and be mature about it but she deserves to be treated like shit and I hope your husband is now your ex husband. Once a cheater always a cheater. I don't understand why people chose to cheat -_-
kamikrazy 6
I agree. But I would take the house I'm living in first.
junkman6 22
Maturity my ass cockroaches infest places fast and I'm sure you can find a mother load of them not all that far from your house. Hint- old meat a fish tank and a small ramp next to a dumpster they come in after the rotting food and can't climb out. Diabolical disgusting and mean I vote you do it.
kitsy 14
Why? It is possible that she didn't know that OP's husband was married. I know she's a neighbor but if I met somebody on in my neighborhood and they didn't tell me about their life, I would assume they weren't married.
motoxraceman2345 1
Put a pinhole in his breaklines. Cut he will notice. Pinhole he will get down the road
Rowdey 10
Is that right?