Today, after giving a potential employee a drug test and instructing her to leave her urine sample in the bathroom, she not only brought it into the office, she spilled it on the front desk. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Pissed
Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling the cup of piss all over myself. I had to explain what had happened, then go sit in a waiting room full of disgusted-looking people, while I kept drinking water to fill my bladder back up. FML
Are you taking the piss?
Today, I was being drug tested as part of a pre-employment policy for substitute teaching. Once I had peed in the cup enough to pass the line, I put it on the only available space: the toilet paper holder. Trying to get toilet paper, I knocked the cup over, spilling pee all over myself. FML
Waste of time
Today, the lab wouldn't let me do my pre-employment drug test because they had no time when I had to pee really bad. They signed me in to do other blood work I needed, but when I asked to use the bathroom, they said it was for drug testing only. I peed myself in the lobby and couldn't do the blood test either. FML
Today, I took a drug test. Not only did I fail the drug test, but I mostly missed the sample cup and got urine all over my pants. FML
Today, my boss used the restroom at work. She returned and told me I needed to go clean the toilet because "someone left a mess in there." It was her mess. FML
The customer is always right
Today, at work, a woman decided to use the changing room as a public toilet, to wipe the urine with the clothes she tried on, then leave the mess along with her soiled underwear and a used maxi pad for me to clean up. FML
Today, I had to take a mandatory drug test with the doctor present. Nervous, I couldn't get myself to pee in the cup right away. When I finally did, I couldn't stop myself from overfilling the cup and getting pee all over myself. FML
Straining
Today, I had to go to the clinic for a physical. The nurse asked me for a pee sample; however, I had no urine to give. After 20 minutes of standing at the stall I was able to squeeze half a cup of pee. As I approached the sink to cover the sample, I somehow managed to drop it all over myself. FML
Today, I went to get blood and urine tests done before work. As I was attempting to aim into the cup, I lost balance and slipped. I ended up peeing on my sleeves and my pants. I was late for work and I smelled like pee. FML
Today, one of my co-workers was fired after my manager discovered him pissing in the office coffee pot. I had three cups before I found out what had happened. FML
Top comments
floridagreg 10
That would really "piss" me off.
Dave_Davington 34
I think wee all agree that that's really unpleasant. Still, you'd bladder clean that up before it starts to smell.
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Comments (65)
floridagreg 10
That would really "piss" me off.
crazy_loner 25
Damn, 10 hours too late.
jake131000 21
Admit it, everyone of us were thinking this... Congrats on being top comment.
EmiEvelyn 12
Don't these comments usually get downvoted to oblivion?
Dave_Davington 34
I think wee all agree that that's really unpleasant. Still, you'd bladder clean that up before it starts to smell.
moodyreallyrocks 27
Have the whole office sanitized!!
MandieL 27
Or maybe just the front desk and floor?
RememberSchlitz 9
Naga... Naga... Nnnnagaworkhereanymore (laughter)
hellobobismyname 24
*crickets*
hexbox117 11
drugs are bad mmkay..
sirrubberduckie 37
Look, Office Space is awesome, but that reference just doesn't work in this situation.
jake131000 21
But did they get the job?
nonsensical 26
And did she have to pee in the cup again? Or was she simply shown the door after that? So many questions!
mohamed_H 21
Asking the real questions here
rockeditionbarbi 14
Something tells me that she won't be getting the "you're hired" call.
captain_hero89 22
that's a pretty slack drug test. when ever i have to do one they stand within 5 feet away from you and pretty much only let you touch your zipper
holly_fly 34
Where do you take drug tests... The only thing they've ever done for me is telling me to not take a bag in.
slyde32 12
in Australia they pretty much stand over your shoulder.
rsue 14
I worked at a staffing agency (as I think OP probably does too -- we had the same problem a LOT, though no spills) and people were always shocked when we just had them leave their bag outside or empty their pockets. I had to TELL some people to close the door. I get worrying about fakes, but considering 98% of our (relatively few) positives were just weed, I never felt like it was necessary to completely dehumanize someone like that, you know?
writergirl1029 17
Urine is sterile. OP will need to clean up so it doesn't smell bad, but sanitizing is overkill.
Migole 36
@20: That's actually a myth. The moment it leaves your body it gets contaminated with loads of stuff that's on the surface of your vulva. It's only (mostly) sterile while still in the bladder. Not considering things like bacteria from UTI etc.
LokiDasWolf 9
Heck in the Army the tester has his face close enough to get splashback
Jezterking 15
In some species that's considered marking your territory :)
Eatsleep 3
Sounds like that person should be made ceo
Kramer1998 20
Well i take it she's lost her chance?