Today, after careful consideration, I told my wife I really want to have kids. She laughed, until she finally realized I was serious, at which point she flicked me in the balls and said, "Problem solved." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML
Today, I was talking with my wife of five years, and I gave her a few hints about wanting kids. After our talk, she looked at me completely serious and said, "Yeah yeah, kids are great and all, but can't we just get you a dog?" FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me up by punching me in the balls. It’s OK, I didn’t want kids anyway. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I had an argument about wanting kids, as I want to have kids but she doesn’t. I explained the situation to my sister. She just kicked me in the nuts and said, “There, problem solved.” FML
Today, I was told by my wife that we were going to be parents. We are both females. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She got incredibly excited and started flapping her hands around. Then she suddenly went deadpan and said, "But seriously… No." FML
Today, things were going great with my girlfriend of six months. She knew I had kids and it seemed to be getting serious, so I decided to introduce her to them. After dinner, I walked her to her car and she said, "That’s real nice but what are you going to do with them once you and I have kids?" FML
Today, my husband of 6 years said in a grave voice that he had some important news for me. Jokingly, I said, "Why, did you get that cute colleague of yours pregnant?" He did. FML
Today, my husband told me he'd changed his mind and no longer wants children. We already have two kids. FML
Today, my girlfriend blew up at me for a comment I had made several weeks ago about not wanting kids. Then, she told me that she's pregnant. After consoling her and telling her that whatever we do, we'll do it together, she further explained that she's not sure if it's mine. FML
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Top comments
mpj13 8
It's not really solved
Principessa101 20
You didn't discuss wanting children before you got married?
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Comments (216)
vhivfe 3
I don't blame her. I would have have done the same so YDI It's for the best
wilddun 1
Divorce is probably the best solution. Or you can decide you actually love your wife and not love the idea of a broodmare for your children and get snipped.
StrawberryFlesh 1
Your wife is a smart woman. Too smart for you. Go find a broodmare to knock up.
brhu 5
I just saw the exact same scenario in a Cyanide & Happiness comic from June 9th, 2007. Except she kicked rather than flicked.
TofuSpaceships 3
Well it's not like the C&H comics are completely impossible events that could never, ever, ever happen in the real world.
rkzemke 3
Haha, your wife sounds pretty funny though.
TrueFG 2
Then people wonder what makes husbands kill their wives. =
crazy4books23 13
Think about it. We women have to carry the kid around inside us for nine months. We will get the back pain and morning sickness, the labor and birth. What do you men do during those nine long months?
Celestia1982 5
Wow...why the hell did this guy deserve getting hit in the balls for telling his WIFE that he'd like to have children? She seems like a bitch to me. Children are a normal product of marriage, I don't think he was out of line bringing it up to her. She's the one that needs to be smacked.
6demon6spawn6 12
why are you with her?
furubafan74 18
Why wouldn't you have discussed this while you two were still dating? Whether or not someone wants kids is something you should know *before* you make the legal commitment.