Today, a man finally was flirting with me in a supermarket checkout lane, even offering to help unload my groceries onto the conveyor. Turns out he was just distracting everyone so his partner in crime could steal $200 from the cash register. I had to give a witness statement to the manager. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while walking around the local thrift store, I noticed an attractive guy watching me and following me through the aisles. As he followed me to my car I was sure I would get his number. He then asks me to bring my purse inside as I had been tagged as a shoplifter. I work at the store. FML
Today, I was shopping with my husband. At the self-checkout, one of the items I was buying for him as a gift didn’t register. As we were walking out, I get stopped and escorted to the loss prevention office, where I was accused of stealing. FML
Today, I was shopping in the mall. A cute store worker kept checking me out, so after I picked a few things I went up to her and started flirting. After a few seconds, she cut me off and said, "Actually I was watching you because you look like someone who would shoplift." FML
Today, I spent twenty minutes helping an elderly man figure out how to use the self-checkout. When we'd finished, he smiled, thanked me, then walked away… without paying for any of his groceries. The cashier assumed I was with him. FML
Today, I was at the store when I saw that a cart in the checkout line next to me was starting to roll away and the owner hadn't noticed. I tried to help by reaching out to stop the cart from moving, but when the owner saw me with the cart, she began to hit me for trying to steal her purse. FML
Today, I went to the store, but after I'd selected my items, I saw that I'd forgotten my wallet. When I tried to explain to the cashier, he thought that I was trying to steal and called the cops. My roommate had to come to the store to save me. FML
Today, I was at work as a grocery store cashier. I felt a hand slap my ass. Turning around I saw an old man winking at me and I screamed. When my manager came to deal with the problem she didn't believe me and gave the man a $25 gift card for "the trouble" I caused. FML
Today, while bagging my groceries at a store, a lady came over to me, took a good look at the food I'd bought, picked out an item and put it in her bag. When I confronted her, she called security on me and told them I wanted to steal her stuff. I got thrown out and she walked away with a smirk. FML
Today, I saw an elderly woman struggling to reach the top shelf in my local grocery store, so I went over and asked if she needed help. She then accused me of flirting with her and had me escorted from the property. FML
Today, at work at a grocery store an old couple came through my checkout lane. As I was putting their bagged groceries in the cart, the old man started feeling me up. FML
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Top comments
A_Troll_Account 3
At least it wasn't you he robbed!
TrentJ 12
Take it as a compliment. The crook could have flirted with anyone in the store as a diversion and he picked you <3 Is this the beginning of a rom-com maybe?
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Comments (25)
A_Troll_Account 3
At least it wasn't you he robbed!
Welshite 40
No wonder I'm so poor. I never realized successful flirting resulted in money.
freddygasman 18
You want to be careful about flirting for money though. I believe they call that prostitution or solicitation, depending on your judicial jurisdiction.
ThrottleJockey 36
If you're a waiter or waitress you're already a prostitute as you are working for tips (and living off of the tips.) This is coming from a guy who waited tables for 8 years. Hell, I once let a retiring school teacher grab my ass at her retirement party for a $20 tip. ;-)
cupcakekate9 14
You didn't know that that was going to happen. It's not your fault OP. Sucks that it happened to you, but at least nobody got hurt.
captain_hero89 22
sounds like an odd plan
d3rpb0t 10
At least it wasn't a soiled homeless guy with noxious bo, bugs in his hair and a cheap beer in hand.
jacobacon 8
Ayyy I see what you did there
TrentJ 12
Take it as a compliment. The crook could have flirted with anyone in the store as a diversion and he picked you <3 Is this the beginning of a rom-com maybe?
popaulina 8
At least they didn't think you were involved...
Etweens96 25
Thank god it wasn't you he robbed but that seriously sucks they had to resort to stealing from their workplace.
ezrajab 22
Sorry op. I have heard of things like that happening to others I know it isn't much consolation but it is usually several people working together
WhoDatHiThere 9
At least you know people will still hit on you, you won't be lonely forever!