Today, a little girl at my work had an accident. She asked me to help her change, and as she was changing she stuck her hand in her vagina to make sure all the "peepee was gone". She then put that same hand on my face to balance herself as she finished changing. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in a public bathroom, when a little boy walked in and he had an 'accident'. He asked if I could help him clean it up, so I decided to help. I started to walk to him to assist him. That's when I walked straight into the pee and slipped. My whole back was covered in pee. FML
Today, at work, some little girl went in the bathroom for quite a while. Came out for two minutes and went back in. She then came out with her finger clutched in a paper towel. One of the other coworkers went in to check the bathroom. The little girl wrote "Hi!" with her own poop. FML
Today, my daughter went potty. Just as she always does, she came up to me and announced, "I flushed, and wiped, and shut the light off." Then she did something brand new. She covered my face with her hand and asked, "Do these fingers smell?" They did. FML
Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML
Today, as I was about to go in the bathroom, a girl walked out, shaking water off her hands. Some of it landed on my face, and I just wiped it off. Then she said to her friend who was waiting for her, "The sink's broken. Can I use your hand sanitizer?" So what landed on my face? FML
Today, I was babysitting a little girl. She told me she wanted to go to the park, so we did. As we were walking back, I was carrying her on my back. When we were almost at the front door, she told me she had to pee. I told her to hold it in for a second. As we were walking through the door, I felt a warm spot on my back. FML
Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML
Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML
Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML
Today, I was at work, and was told to clean up the urine that a child had left down the slide inside the play place. While in the slide, another little kid peed on my head. FML
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Top comments
aback 5
It would make more sense if you said the kid put her hand in her crotch. The way you've got it, it sounds like she was fisting herself. :/
stonerchu 0
Yuck
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Comments (210)
Chubtubdaplaya 0
@24- You think you need to submit your little embarrassing little remark as an FML!
whomajigi 0
That sucks, but this is the equivalent of someone in the medical profession complaining they got puked on. It happens in that line of work, get over it.
I2OI3 0
Would you be writing FML if your brand new puppy licked her vajayjay and then proceeded to give you sloppy kisses on your face? Think about that - it's just a little kid, you're not going to get any STD's
Fanoodle 0
KINKY?....
rawrrrx 0
lmfao, oh god this is why i hate working with little kids thats so nasty haha but yeah agreed with #44, at least youre safe!
rukusrazor 0
#37 & 41 - Pedobear does not approve. Too old. Have a seat over there.
Emill_fml 0
LOL!!!
dreamsmean 3
i kinda get now why everyone comments on when people say "then proceeded to".. everyone seems to be using that in these.. anyway thats gross. but i also dont like kids..
patray_angel 0
While that is gross, I am not sure if the child really understood what she just did. As far as kids touching themselves, I would say that that is rather normal. My daughter is 16 months and a lot of times when I change her diaper, I have to constantly move her hands out of the way so I can clean her off and get the new diaper put on.
1AAC 0
isnt that the most action you'll get?
idontgiveone 0
FHL. That memory will probably never go away as nothing on the internet does.