Today, a little girl at my work had an accident. She asked me to help her change, and as she was changing she stuck her hand in her vagina to make sure all the "peepee was gone". She then put that same hand on my face to balance herself as she finished changing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in a public bathroom, when a little boy walked in and he had an 'accident'. He asked if I could help him clean it up, so I decided to help. I started to walk to him to assist him. That's when I walked straight into the pee and slipped. My whole back was covered in pee. FML
Today, at work, some little girl went in the bathroom for quite a while. Came out for two minutes and went back in. She then came out with her finger clutched in a paper towel. One of the other coworkers went in to check the bathroom. The little girl wrote "Hi!" with her own poop. FML
Today, my daughter went potty. Just as she always does, she came up to me and announced, "I flushed, and wiped, and shut the light off." Then she did something brand new. She covered my face with her hand and asked, "Do these fingers smell?" They did. FML
Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML
Today, as I was about to go in the bathroom, a girl walked out, shaking water off her hands. Some of it landed on my face, and I just wiped it off. Then she said to her friend who was waiting for her, "The sink's broken. Can I use your hand sanitizer?" So what landed on my face? FML
Today, I was babysitting a little girl. She told me she wanted to go to the park, so we did. As we were walking back, I was carrying her on my back. When we were almost at the front door, she told me she had to pee. I told her to hold it in for a second. As we were walking through the door, I felt a warm spot on my back. FML
Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML
Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML
Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML
Today, I was at work, and was told to clean up the urine that a child had left down the slide inside the play place. While in the slide, another little kid peed on my head. FML
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Top comments
aback 5
It would make more sense if you said the kid put her hand in her crotch. The way you've got it, it sounds like she was fisting herself. :/
stonerchu 0
Yuck
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Comments (210)
st87 0
I trust that you proceeded to wash ur face THOROUGHLY before getting a kiss on the cheek from your boyfriend?
Dude_fml 0
she's a keeper
brie3 0
seriously, wtf?
Erinx3 0
OH MY GOD. Ewh!
xXirinaXx 0
Byack. I mean eww... In my way.
iEuphorical 0
You should specify where you work. If it was a daycare or something, okay. Otherwise, does the child not have parents?
dancin303 0
little kids thing their vaginas are their "pee pee holes" even though its not. you will be okay im pretty ure op, just go take a few showers to make yourself feel better
Reckoner_fml 0
#24 you are a dumb ****. i am a man and i know women have three holes. like a penis has one there is a little thing called a urethra.... read up on your anatomy you dumb shit.....
deathproof_fml 0
Oh that is ******* gross.
JiggstheMan 0
you just make me never want to have kids. sorry though
jadahgirl7 0
ICK. that's a little bit toooo much information to be sharing about your child. too many mental images that could make some fml perv very happy. jeeeez. :/