Today, a few friends and I ran through sprinklers at our school until we were all soaked. Then we were told that they put fertilizer in the water. I'm soaked in manure. Now I know why it tasted weird. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized why "Stay off the grass" signs were all over campus. I cut through the grass on my way to my next class and tripped over a sprinkler head, breaking it off and soaking myself in muddy water. I had to sit through a 4-hour lecture with wet, muddy clothes. FML
Today, I was lying in a lawn chair next to my wooden fence when a yellow liquid started spraying me. The neighbor's douchebag son was peeing through the small hole in the fence and soaked me. FML
Today, I arrived at work early. I noticed the plants on the side of my classroom could use some water so I went out to do so. On the way, I found a beer can. Not wanting the kids to see it, I picked it up but some spilled on my dress. I quickly noticed a familiar smell. No, not beer. Urine. FML
Today, I was at soccer practice. The ground's keeper just aerated the field, and my teammates and I decided to throw the cylindrical clumps of dirt at each other. I got hit in the face with one. It wasn't dirt. It was a clump of wet dog poop. FML
Today, I was hanging with my friends when out of the blue, I got thirsty. Friends said there was Gatorade in the fridge. Being the trusting person I am, I took a drink, only to discover it was piss. FML
Today, as I was walking to wash my hands after using the restroom, the guy walking away from the sink flicked water from his hands towards the floor. Water splashed all over my beige shorts. I had to walk back into class looking like I'd peed my pants. FML
Today, at a party, my three friends and I thought it would be fun to urinate in a jug. We dislike the neighbours, so decided to throw the contents of the jug over the fence into their garden. It hit a tree and splashed back. I ended up covered in our piss. FML
Today, I noticed that my sweat smelled like cat food. FML
Today, I was at a music festival, watching one of my favorite bands. The security guys were throwing water into the crowd to cool us down. I saw some about to be thrown by another fan, so I stood with my mouth open to catch some of it. I ended up with a face full of hot piss. FML
Today, I was at assembly in school. My friend had a water bottle. It was a squirt bottle, and he squirted me, over and over. I got ticked off, so I took it away from him, but when I took the bottle I squeezed it and it squirted all over the people in front of me. The principal saw, and I got in trouble. FML
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Top comments
littlemissdqgirl 8
that's just gross
JesseJaymz 0
no slow motion baywatch run for yall
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Comments (150)
bhatz 0
they mix manure with water? I thought they mix a special kind of chemical with water. I call bs on this one.
lyndis_fml 0
There is no manure in the sprinklers. You are ignorant of the existence of chemical fertilizers. This is your own fault. Learn more.
skgirl 0
same thing happened to my friends and I
xarcanus 0
They'd mix garden style fertilizer with the water; y'know like garden hose attachment fertilizer that you can get to make your lawn grow better. It's a mixture of Nitrate, Phosphorous and Potassium, none of which are very detrimental to your health.
turbopuss 1
I highly doubt that it was shit it was prolly some other kind of fertilizer with phosphate or something in it how would you put shit in a sprinkler think a little dumbass
lovelylew21 0
why would u taste it in the first place??
spitfire35 3
They usually put chemical fertilizer in water. Not manure.
suffokateslowly 0
now u can say i eat pieces of shit like u for breakfast hahahah
jackie31337 0
Look on the bright side: maybe it was an inorganic fertilizer, so you might just be covered in ammonia, phosphates, and/or nitrogen.
Wet_Queef 0
dumbfuck