Today, after a huge fight, my girlfriend started coming onto me. I thought it was actual make-up sex and went along with it. It was great, until she suddenly shoved me off her just as I was almost ready to come. She smugly announced she was dumping me, got dressed, then left. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML
Today, my wife and I were having amazing make up sex after several months of painful separation. Halfway through, she screamed for me to stop, climbed off the bed, and ran into the bathroom. She spent an hour screaming and crying, then came out and emotionlessly told me to leave. FML
Today, I got dumped during sex. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours, hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming, "I meant it!" FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML
Today, some filthy creep grabbed my girlfriend's ass in front of me. I smashed his face in, as would be expected. Afterwards, we had wild sex, then she cried, told me how frightened my "unprovoked violent response" made her, and kicked me out. I'm now in a seedy motel, wondering what the hell happened. FML
Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when a girl came out of nowhere, screaming at me for cheating on her, and saying she was dumping me. I've never seen her before, and she was almost grinning during her little act, but my girlfriend believed it, and I'm now single. FML
Today, my normally-prudish girlfriend grabbed my crotch and said, "I want you to fuck me like I've never been fucked." I obliged. She loved it, until after we'd finished, when she decided that she felt "cheap, gross, and used" and started a huge fight. FML
Today, after having a fight with my boyfriend, we had what I thought to be the best make-up sex, because he seemed so happy and upbeat. Turns out he misunderstood. He was happy because he thought it was break-up sex. FML
Today, after a week of intense fighting, my girlfriend of 4 years and I hung out. She told me she loved me, and I pointed out that last week she said she was going to dump me. Without missing a beat, she replied, "Only to scare you into submission." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Aew 17
That's a cold, calculating ex girlfriend. She has excellent brakes as well.
Googolman 29
Well, you have to admire her impeccable timing.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (74)
fantasyworld 39
She's cold.
ladyg228 15
Something must be very wrong with her who the hell can have sex with someone they plan on breaking up with so weird
nreed32 20
At least you got it in one last time.
jake238 9
Reminds of wolf of wall streey
lawnguy 11
blue balls is a hell of a going away gift.
Hash13 13
Oh man, that's harsh.
JKPwnage 27
That bitch...
Parvati48 15
Wow OP I am so sorry! That's ****** up for her to do to you. You deserve better than that, good luck with the next girl. Hopefully she is more deserving and not as ****** up. :/
Kitsi 14
You wanted make up sex, she wanted break up sex. She won that debate lol
Jellysweetheart 23
Yes this was kind of cruel, but we don't know what the fight was about. OP could have cheated or something, we don't know if he did something to deserve the reaction.