Today, as well as for the past two weeks, my brother has been making up songs about farts and singing them non-stop. He's 26. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my friend has been continuously played Skibidi Toilet on repeat and singing the song. She's 28. FML
Today, I walked in on my father and brother attempting to harmonize their farts. FML
Today, my brother learned how to fake cry. I've been catching shit for everything I've done and said near him ever since. FML
Today, I accidentally farted really loud. My 4 year-old brother heard me and started crying, and stopped talking to me for a whole hour. Now he tells everyone about "that time his sister farted." FML
Today, my brother tried to sit on my head and fart, except he followed through. It didn’t make it past his trousers but for a few brief seconds before he ran to the bathroom I could smell it and feel how warm it was. FML
Today, my brother started a new tradition: sending me pictures of every poop he takes. FML
Today, my brother decided it would be funny for almost every sentence out of his mouth to start with the word "hashtag". FML
Today, I had to sit through an entire conversation where my sister and her boyfriend sent voice messages to one another, of their farts. FML
Today, my fiancé changed his text message tone to a fart noise. He thinks it's hilarious and laughs every time he gets a text. He's 35 years-old. FML
Today, my brother came to my first standup comedy act. He'd apparently read my material beforehand, and kept finishing my jokes for me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ahabsfan 17
Would you rather he be silent, but deadly?
ThunderLightTSV 31
How mature of him. Maybe he'll make a living of it on the internet if you're lucky.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (34)
Lachie20001 21
FaZe Adapt?
Becca34 31
Probably better than most songs on the radio nowadays
ThunderLightTSV 31
You are now at the mercy of the Opinion Police. You poor soul.
ThirteenThirteen 27
At least he's not running up to you and farting when you least expect it.
SomeRandomUser 19
He probably started this with three other friends. Ask his old babysitter.
Nasus_fml 8
faze apex?
peepeebandit 16
Hey, the day fart humor is no longer funny, life becomes boring in my opinion.
IAMTONTON 2
Sounds a lot like FaZe Adapt
Talented73 54
Rectum? Damn near killed 'um!
krh979 3
is it FaZe Adapt?
LARC_UoGuelph 9
Jim Croce - Time in a Bottle (B-Fong's fart rendition): If I could save fart in a bottle the first thing that I'd like to... Is stick it up your bum and tell you to fart away until there was no more left in you... If I could make smells last forever... If lighters could make bum blasts burn blue... I'd save every fart and lob them at flames see what they would do... I'll show myself out.
LARC_UoGuelph 9
Jim Croce - Time in a Bottle (B-Fong's fart rendition): If I could save fart in a bottle the first thing that I'd like to do Is to stick it up your bum and tell you to fart away until there was no more left in you If I could make smells last forever If lighters could make bum blasts burn blue I'd save every fart, and lob them at flames, and see what they would do... But there never seems to be enough gas from the burritos when I shart them... I've dined around enough to know that Taco Bell is the one that gives me the most ass width.