Today, my District Manager was impressed by all the appointments in my upcoming calendar. Bubbling with pride, I blurted out, "Oh, I just love to have all my slots filled!" The awkward silence was only broken by, "That's what she said!" from the next cubicle. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boss said to me: 'You know, our competitors are also hiring!' FML
Today, I addressed my district manager as "Dude." FML
Today, at work, I casually mentioned I was meeting some friends for dinner. My co-worker's response was, "You have friends?!" FML
Today, I went for a lunch interview for my dream job. The interview was great and at the end, I tried to seal the deal by complimenting my future boss. I said, "You're really hardworking. Do you always work on a Saturday?" He looked at me, smiled and then wrote something down. Today's Friday. FML
Today, I was so bored at my job as a receptionist that I actually got excited when the phone rang. FML
Today, at work, I was standing around, doing nothing. When my coworker pointed this out, I laughed and said, "It's okay, I'm training for a supervisor position!" Guess who was standing right behind me. FML
Today, my manager called me in to tell me I got the promotion I've been hoping for. He then said that since I didn't look excited about it he might have to rethink it. I was too busy concentrating on holding in diarrhea. FML
Today, the coworker I've had a crush on for the past few months asked me if I was busy Friday night. I was so excited, I immediately replied, "I thought you'd never ask!" He gave me a funny look and said, "Good, because I need you to take my shift." FML
Today, I had an appraisal meeting with The Boss. She raved and gushed and told me what a great job I was doing. Then she said, "Well done, Eric!" Eric isn't my name. She froze, opened a new file, and told me my actual appraisal, which was the complete opposite of everything she had just said. FML
Today, I came to work ready to impress my boss. A couple of weeks ago I asked him for a promotion from stock to sales and I have been proving myself worthy. Turns out he hired a new girl for sales, with great, big, fake breasts. FML
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Top comments
RickySleeves 20
That's actually fricken funny
TheTardis123 11
Glad to see you enjoy work. Not everyone can be happy with what they do. :)
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Comments (56)
tranced_ 45
cool guy spotted in the next cubicle ;)
hailhydra 6
I'm sure the District Manager loves filing all your slots. keeps the office productive and makes for a very happy ending
TheIronFez 13
Think before you speak.
Angsty_Armadillo 25
I honestly would have laughed, or at least chucked. Don't be too hard on yourself OP shit happens! The only thing you can do is just hope that he finds it as funny as your coworker obviously did. :)
abNormal62 23
Surprised nobody's asked when your next opening is coming available
Teyros 24
You sort of asked for that one OP!
SydLovesLacey 18
Bet you got some openings coming soon though, make sure they're all filled!
Polynomial 28
17 beat you to it, Boss.
mds9986 24
This is one of those situations that bother you for years and years when your trying to sleep.
ImTheAlpha 30
I don't get it...
toasterspoon 17
A girl has three slots to fill think about it
lurker_no_more 13
ok, replace the word slots with holes.. that should help :)
ZoroMiHawk 25
You will, in a couple of years when you're older.
sarcasmwins 24
One in the pink, one in the stink and if you don't click on to where the last slot is you're way too young for this shit.
AyeJay101 25
Please tell me the DM enjoyed that... Maybe become a new favorite or even better a promotion!
joshi42 16
She should reserve a slot or two for him.