Today, I was at a café with my friends when an elderly man noticed my dimples. He came up to me, stroked them while whispering, "One in a million" then walked out. Now my friends do this to me constantly, even while driving home. I almost hit a tree. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was out shopping with my mom. While we were walking, a guy in a car honked at me. I'm not used to compliments, so I was pretty flattered and flashed him a smile. He looked back at me, confused, then shook his head and pointed at my mom. FML
Today, I took my daughter to the grocery store. The bag boy seemed to be flirting with me and smiling. He had to be half my age. Once in the car I glimpsed myself in the rear view mirror. I had chocolate completely covering one of my front teeth. FML
Today, someone left a note on my car, saying "You're gorgeous. Call me. #######." I called the number and they said they saw me in the store I was in, telling me "You were the ONLY attractive person in there." We decided to meet up. He walks over, I say hi, he says "I think I put my number on the wrong car." FML
Today, I was at Starbucks after having a rough day. The old man beside me was talking to his friend. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him point at me and say, "See that beautiful girl over there?" Flattered, I listened closer… until he finished his statement with, "She's gonna die." FML
Today, as I was walking out of a restaurant with my boyfriend, I saw some guys checking me out. One of them walked up to my boyfriend and said, "Dude, you and your girlfriend have matching moustaches!" FML
Today, I met a guy while out with some friends. He kept blowing up his cheeks, so I did it back to him and asked him why he did it. He pulled out a card from his wallet and pointed at it. It was a card saying he may have speech or facial difficulties because he had a stroke when he was 12. FML
Today, I was walking down the street and while stopped at a light, this old man waved at me. Thinking nothing of it, I walked through a parking lot to get to where I was going, where he not only followed me, but mistook me for a prostitute. It was 5pm. FML
Today, this really cute guy at work kept flirting with me and cracking the funniest jokes. Before he left, he told me how much he enjoyed making me smile. An hour later, I saw my reflection in a mirror, I had a huge piece of food stuck in my teeth. FML
Today, an old man walked up to me, said, "Hey missy, you wanna see an antique?" and winked. FML
Today, as I was taking an evening jog around my neighbourhood, I passed an elderly woman. I grinned at her as sign of friendliness to a common pedestrian. She grinned back. Whilst staring at my crotch. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
You could have put a dimple in tree, then there would be two in a million.
d4m4s74 12
If you're one a million, there are six thousand like you
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Comments (102)
SailorSTFU 15
Oh wow, that's beyond creepy. That sucks, OP.
BrookeLouisee 4
Just a lil but creepy
cartedor 18
You are so totally weird, how can you be so relax about random weirdo invading your personal space? Next time this happens bet your phone or wallet will be gone with the stranger. Bet you, just you wait
omfgshiz 7
Omg hahaha this fml just made my morning. I wish this happened to one of my friend, I wouldn't let her forget it. :'D but on a serious note, I'd be so freaked out.
fyl7899 12
Dimples look like craters. Not at all attractive.
isabellegypsy 12
Rude
janedo5513 5
I can imagine the old man from family guy doing this to the OP!
isabellegypsy 12
That's really creepy OP, but also very funny!
kriz_allizwell 6
Dimples are pretty common. I mean, look at the roads after a downpour.
SiriusBlack97 17
That's ******* hilarious.
chrisp87 11
Seems to me he has a crush on you and takes a liking to your dimples. If this old man freaked you out that bad perhaps it's time you go to another cafe.