Today, I really wanted something to drink. I looked in the fridge, and found some of my grandma's soy milk. I took a swig, and instead of tasting soy, I tasted something rotten. Turns out my grandma knows I drink her soy milk, so she swapped it with expired chicken broth. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found a small bottle of chocolate milk in the fridge from McDonald's. I've been living with my grandparents while going to college and figuring they'd never drink it themselves, I took a sip. It had expired two years ago. FML
Today, I discovered why the milk in my house has a funny, sweet taste. My family has been pouring the leftover milk from their cereal back into the carton. FML
Today, the host family that I'm staying with in China gave me a small milk box to drink. It tasted a bit tangy and sour, but I thought that was probably just the taste of milk in China. Trying to be polite, I practically chugged the whole box. Later, I found out that it had expired 20 days ago. FML
Today, my roommate thought that "sour milk" would taste like sour candy. She left a jug of milk out for two days, then took a huge gulp, vomited everywhere, and dropped the jug. Now the kitchen stinks of rotten dairy. FML
Today, I saw my mom changing the expiry date on milk. She genuinely thought this would make the milk sour later. FML
Today, I visited my grandma. She offered me some chips in a Ziploc bag. I thought they were sour cream and onion chips from the look of them. They tasted funny, but I didn't want to be rude and I kept eating. I looked closer after a while and noticed that what I thought were chives was actually mold. FML
Today, I'm taking care of my 12-year-old daughter because my ex-wife thought she could cure our daughter's lactose intolerance by sneaking milk into her soy breakfast. The milk had expired. FML
Today, while tidying up my grandmother's fridge, I got to play expiration-date-bingo. The winner was some type of concentrated apple sauce supposed to be used for salad dressings. It expired in 1986. FML
Today, I was pouring milk into my coffee and, as it plooped into my mug, I noticed the expiration date on the jug passed two weeks ago. Nobody here drinks milk very often and I ran out of creamer, so I've been unknowingly drinking my coffee with curdled milk for the past three days. FML
Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for something to drink. I found a jug of lemonade with a piece of paper on it saying "Mom's Lemonade, Don't Drink!" I was really thirsty, so I ignored it and drank the whole jug. My mom is about to have a colonoscopy and had filled it with laxatives. FML
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Top comments
Flutist 3
Your grandmother is Epic. I don't understand why you would drink out of the carton. She's your grandmother. Have some manners. Buy your own ******* milk.
boner_93 2
wow, that kinda sucks. way to go grandma!
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Comments (77)
lifeisgood8 0
what a mean grandma!!!!! but then again i wouldnt want some nasty kid drinking my soy milk out of the carton YDI for not putting it in a glasss....wheres your respect. she is probably fine with you drinking it as long as you dont drink it out of the carton
Spitfire_fml 0
Dude, what an old ******* bitch. What she cant share her soy milk? Are you serious? Stupid ****. And #65, it's her grandson you idiot, how is that "some nasty kid?"
chaos753159 4
what ever happened to water??
marleytooyou 0
dude fuckking fly ass grandma
peaceSUCKAh 0
haha win for grandma
TheOptimist 0
Swig is such a bothersome word...
marc70 3
you deserve it for drinking her soy milk
JBVL 0
wouldn't of happened if you listened to your mom and didn't drink from the carton.
nbeers 0
hahaha made my day
jregier89 7
Your grandma is f**king crazy!!