Today, my very handsome, fit, Russian boyfriend tried to make me feel better about being a little overweight by telling me, "It's okay, you're American, everyone expects you to be fat." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. Everything seemed to be going well, when all of a sudden he turned to look at me with a pensive and thoughtful expression. I expected him to say something important, but instead he just said, "I was wondering, how does it feel to be fat?" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I gained a few pounds and thought I looked fat. He replied that I looked the same and that I shouldn't worry because he likes fat girls. I never thought I was fat before this. FML
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend about how I'm self conscious about my weight. He looks at me and says, "Don't worry babe, I've always been kind of a chubby chaser." FML
Today, my boyfriend sent me a text that said, "I can't be seen with you anymore. You're too fat." FML
Today, while having dinner with my boyfriend's family, his mom told me that it looks like I've gained quite some weight. When my boyfriend told her that this was a rude thing to say, she said it wasn't rude, just the truth. FML
Today, a Russian guy came up to me on the train and informed me that I look exactly like a typical Russian woman. He then went on to explain that I even had enough fat to survive their cold winters. FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend about how self conscious I am and how I obsess about my weight. He said, "Don't be ridiculous, you don't need to lose THAT much weight." FML
Today, my chunky boyfriend told me that he'd be less attracted to me if I gained weight. I have low self-esteem. FML
Today, several Ukrainians didn't believe me when I said I was American. Apparently I'm not fat enough. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm now about 15 pounds overweight. When I called him a hypocrite as he's over 40 pounds overweight, he said that his weight didn't matter because "it's the girl's job to look hot." FML
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Top comments
possumisawesome 0
I guess people assume Americans are fat like they assume Canada is a barren winter wonderland where the inhabitants live in igloos, ride moose and polar bears, and are governed by Tim Hortons. :P
fits138 0
maybe he was joking...? I thought it was funny...
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Comments (474)
mattman1994 0
jeez were not all fat. stupid stereotypes. it's not like we don't hear it enough from the America haters that live here in the first place
maxdashz 0
Yes, most of the women in those statistics are over 50. Now if you were to change those to exclude grandmas you would see 10% at most. Btw this is America's fault due to it's secret weapon, McDonalds. Compare the numbers to 10 years ago.
HeroOfMi 0
only 20%? that's pretty big... still, you make a good point
rydin10 18
You'd better change that profile picture and take a look at the way you write before you continue to make a fool of yourself, #33
kbolt88 0
honestly? it sucks but it's kind of true. 2/3 of the population is overweight...maybe don't eat so much and get more exercise... just sayin...
mattman1994 0
2/3? so you're saying two hundred million out of the three hundred million people that live here are overweight? do some reserarch before you pull some random BS numbers out of your ass dude
Kukua 5
Actually, the National Center for Heath Studies posted the numbers at exactly that - about 66% of Americans are overweight. So do your own research before attempting to debunk others.
mattman1994 0
Percent of noninstitutionalized adults age 20 years and over who are obese: 34% obesity is the problem here. I agree, it is a problem. Being considered "overweight" by American standards is having a body mass index of 30+, where a healthy BMI can be as high as 29.9%. You can be at a 30 and not be fat. That is where the other 32% of your 66 comes from. it's a big number, I agree, but overweightness and obesity are two different things, and these stupid health organizations combine them to scare us into getting healthier
mattman1994 0
to sum it all up, we love our twinkies and cupcakes, so stfu
Kukua 5
You're right Matt, which is why I said overweight, and not obese. :) Either way, it's a number that is going up. 10 years ago, the number was about 10% lower then it is now. So even though a person who is technically overweight might not be fat, you can't deny that Americans are slowly getting fatter. Another scary statistic - for the first time in history, the younger generation has a shorter life expectancy then their parents, because of obesity.
jtag017 0
couldn't be more true
dugumit 0
hahaha awesome.
FYLDeep 26
"In America, you fat, In Soviet Russia, you whale."
jtag017 0
America is the best nation in the world. period. read a book.
lichen_fml 0
Fellow American, please use your socialist access to public education and libraries to learn exactly how wrong you are. Jingoism is not a virtue!
YouKnowJosh 0
only an incredibly naive person would believe that
onorexveritas 24
LMFAO!!!!! i love russian accents <3 but yeh hahahahhaahahahha thas funi
missheep 0
With 64% of overweight and 26% of obese population... ¿what do you spect?
theanonimouse 0
Dude, don't hate on us because we can afford to eat WHATEVER THE **** WE WANT. LONG LIVE AMERICA
rushiee 0
ha then have to pay hostipal bills for having liposuction & all that shit cuz the fats weighing down ur heart yeah, big advantage. you have a goodnight & think about that for a while (:
theanonimouse 0
Wow, I never considered the ramifications of my high-calorie lifestyle! Thanks, internet stranger! I'd keep talking but I have to go exercise now!
Racheluvcats 5
I can afford to eat 'whatever the **** I want' but it doesn't mean I do just that.
mehstupidthings 0
AHAHAHAHHAHAHAH awesome bf :) no, like seriously. at least he didn't break up with you because he is like a "fittie god" (as you make him out to be) and youre like...chubby. anyway stereotypes are funny! its good humor! Just sometimes very stupid like for example. yeah course we aussies are just too stupid to get trains/buses/cars and decide to ride KANGAROOS to school/work; no sillies! we ride emus! (first part annoyance - second sarcasm if you people are too stupid to get the joke-ish thing)
Daowiies 1
Australians come in outta no where too?! oh well I still agree, australia is still pretty damn cool ;D