Today, in a 2-hour period at work, I had to talk to the cops, clean up shit and clean up vomit, yet none of these events were related. The worst part is, I work as a lifeguard and none of this is in the job description. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML
Today, I started my new job as a janitor at a store. The first thing that happened when I came in was another employee telling me that there was vomit in the restroom, and that I had to clean it up. Not only did I clean up vomit, I had to clean up the poop that made the kid puke in the first place. FML
Today, I work in a grocery store and a woman suffering from diarrhea somehow managed to get shit up and down two of the store aisles, then go to the ladies room and mess up the stall. I was the only one working trained in deal with bio-hazardous waste so I had to clean it up. FML
Today, I was working as a paramedic when my patient's colostomy bag exploded all over me. I was covered in fecal matter, with 5 hours left on my shift. FML
Today, while at work I tripped and fell in the pool while moving a waste basket. I nearly drowned and had to be saved. I don't know which is worse the fact that I nearly drowned or the fact that I'm a lifeguard. FML
Today, at work I had to spend two hours cleaning up stinky toilet water. Why? Because yesterday, I forgot to turn on the septic tank pumps. The tank overflowed, and so did all the toilets. My boss is not happy. FML
Today, I was informed by my manager at work that there had been an "accident" in the playground. I then had to crawl through tunnels designed for 5 year-olds, to a tiny playroom with no fresh air, and clean up a stupid kid's pee and crap. FML
Today, whilst at my job as a lifeguard, a small child decided he couldn't hold it any longer and released his bowels in the pool. It was my job to clean up his dump, including the floating pieces of sweetcorn. FML
Today, after my work's Christmas party, everyone got so drunk that I had to help one of my only sober co-workers take everyone home and clean up vomit. FML
Today, after feeling sick all day at work, my shift was about to end. Twenty minutes before I was able to clock out, some kid puked all over herself in the playground. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
They never put any crap like this in a job description. If they did, no one would work.
jbuckets_404 39
Yea it is ie, those unspecified tasks are covered in said job description and/or contract as the last line @ bottom of the page: "Other duties as assigned...." Been there, done that! :-(
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Comments (6)
RichardPencil 32
They never put any crap like this in a job description. If they did, no one would work.
jbuckets_404 39
Yea it is ie, those unspecified tasks are covered in said job description and/or contract as the last line @ bottom of the page: "Other duties as assigned...." Been there, done that! :-(
Chen Zhibang 8
I hope the vomit and the crap are not in the pool...
swmr4life 9
Oh Honey, Lifeguards are Babysitters, Janitors, Maintenance, Cops And Psychologists. You do not even know. *Based on personal experience*
delilah Johnson 4
I don't know what to say about that but umm I'd say that it takes time
AmbrosiaFan 19
Oh you must be new to the job field. "Not in my job description"... LOL...