Today, after months of believing my house is haunted, and years of being scared of the dark, I finally had to admit to myself that the only way I can go to the bathroom in the middle of the night is if my cat follows me and sits outside the door. I'm 23. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took a late-night shower. When I got out afterwards, the bathroom door was ajar, and I could have sworn I heard the faint patter of footsteps in the kitchen. "It's probably the cat," I told myself. Then I went upstairs and saw my cat asleep on my bed. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom and I noticed the balcony door was open. As I went to go close it, I swear I saw my cat wondering outside and I panicked. Long story short, I locked myself out searching for the cat and the next thing I knew, he was meowing at me from the balcony a few feet above me. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs of my apartment building because I thought my cat was a ghost. FML
Today, I experienced the fright of a lifetime when I woke up and heard my bedroom door opening. Fearing that there was an intruder, I picked up a bat and opened the door, ready to whack the mystery intruder. There was no one there. No one, except my cat, who apparently knows how to open doors now. FML
Today, I spent an hour in my car terrified to go inside because I thought my house was being burgled. I saw rapid shadows in the light of my lounge. Eventually I plucked up the courage to creep inside with a rock to find it wasn't a robber. It was my cats, fighting in front of a toppled lamp. FML
Today, I again had to quietly sneak in through my bedroom window. I don't live with my parents. I go through my window because my cat thinks everyone who walks in through the door at night is a burglar or something and attacks them. FML
Today, my psycho cat stood on my toilet seat and challenged me to a stand-off. After 10 minutes, I couldn't hold it in any more and asked to use my neighbor's bathroom instead. I told him my toilet was broken. FML
Today, after moving into my new house, I woke up to strange sounds coming from the kitchen. I panicked and started sobbing, convinced it was either a robbery or a home invasion. Turned out it was just my cat. FML
Today, at the age of 20, I still have a bed time. It is strictly enforced by my cat via endless meows if I am up past 11 pm. FML
Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen. I was freaked out, but I followed him in. There was nobody in the room. I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house. FML
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Top comments
kickass1stbase 7
We all have our way of dealing with things. Don't be ashamed!
kittytub 12
we'll sit with you, but once slenderman starts killing you, we're out of there. meow.
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Comments (147)
Vidrill 22
You said you 've been afraid for years... I can understand it when kids can't face their fears, but you are 23, you have to start trying to fight with your fears, especially since they cause such problems for you. The first few steps in the dark are scary, I know, but soon you'll get used to the fact that there's nothing there. Try a small light at first and try to think rationally.
SammyS2012 21
No, fear of the dark is not solely a child phobia. Stop bing judgmental. I'm 18 and afraid of the dark. I usually have two night lights, but they both burned out and I have yet to buy new bulbs. Sometimes fears just can't be overcome. I have extremely poor vision so many times, I'll wake up from a nightmare, and the shapes in my room tend to move or blur and I can't tell what anything is and that makes me think the Grudge is in my room :/ My solution is to bring my dog in my room :3 my cat hates being in my room when I close the door. If there's something in my room, my dog will alert me to it :)
themarshal_fml 6
Your house isn't haunted, its just The Silence lurking around. Make sure you carry a sharpie at all times so you can mark yourself whenever you see one.
hermitknut 22
I don't know. It could be the Weeping Angels... perhaps he should carry a torch AND a sharpie, just in case?
thisguy45 2
No it's slenderman
texas_redneck88 10
Aaaaand you're from Texas, awesome. GTFO of my state
User90210 5
Your selfish for making your cat wait outside the door.
deefan101 11
Leave a few lights on or get a nightlight. That always helps
Fishfanatic 7
Rosemary infused Saltwater and a shit strong load of anger to cleanse your house. I mean you need to BE ******* angry at YOUR home being invaded/squatted in by whatever you *believe* is there . This will work even if nothing is there, as it works on your own mind more than anything . Scrub as many surfaces as you can , all doorframes and windows. All the while speak out loud (you make up a set of words ) and cast it out verbally and mentally as you would if someone you couldn't ******* stand, had insulted you in your own home, and now you want them to GTFO. " Get the **** out of my house, my space, my life, NOW " Something like that. Every room, every hallway. If you need the toilet in the middle of the night, turn the lights on. Remember to be angry if you still feel scared. Get angry or defiant instead of being scared . Push it out of you into the air around you. As I say it works more on your *own* state of mind than anything else ( and anything possibly hanging about will learn to think twice about trying to leech off your fear ,unless it's a strong bastard )
crimsonlover4 31
63- just had to mention that I am now more scared after reading your suggestion to OP than when I first read the FML lol :/ I do, however, get the point you're trying to make; a very good one at that. As for OP, I understand. I basically leave either my TV on at night or the lights on, especially on the hallway that leads to the bathroom. Good luck OP!
SammyS2012 21
Uh wouldn't being angry at spirits/ghosts only make them stronger?
Mademoiselle_fml 34
That's subjective to opinion. If you believe it will, then it will. I guess overall you just have to have faith in your own strength against them. It is a mainly mental thing, after all.
thisguy45 2
Kitty protection! But you could've just turned on the lights? I mean it stings your eyes but only for a little, you could also put in earphones and listen to your music so you don't hear the house itself.
highfly3003 5
Lol when I was younger I'd take my yu-gi-oh cards and put them in front of me for protection.
vespergreen 17
How adorable! Now I also want a cattttt :P
weby11 12
I'm just like that. You're not alone.