Today, I was at a party, chatting up this guy while we were petting my friends dog. The dog had just been outside and was kinda wet, I assumed it was raining out. Just then someone came up and said "Um, that dog's covered in pee." Apparently someone peed off the deck onto the dog as it walked by. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a friend came over to meet my new dog. The dog got excited and accidentally peed on him. I went to the kitchen to get something to clean it up. When I came back, my new dog was covered in my friend's pee. My friend claimed that peeing on my dog "showed dominance." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out on his deck out back. When leaving, I heard the sliding glass door open on the upper deck, I froze in the yard to not be seen. Too bad I didn't move. Apparently his dad pees off the deck at night. I had to walk home covered in pee. FML
Today, I took my dog to the park. It had recently rained, and he started rolling in something unidentifiable. When I got home, I discovered it was a mixture of mud and who knows what else. Now my house smells like a swamp. FML
Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML
Today, I was pet sitting for a friend. As soon as I walked in the door, I stepped in dog poop. I took off my shoes to clean them, then stepped in cat pee in my socks. FML
Today, I woke up on a friend's floor with a massive hangover after her party last night. My friend, who was next to me, barfed all over me. She then told me that while I was drunk last night, I made out with her dog as well as two of our other friend's boyfriends. FML
Today, I took my dog to the park. He ran straight into a muddy pond, came back to shake himself off, and got mud all over my freshly cleaned white hoodie. A stranger passing by gave us a thumbs up and said, “Good boy!” I'm not sure who he was talking to. FML
Today, I was going for a walk and I kept smelling pee wherever I went. After about an hour, I finally figured out that the smell was me. My dog had peed on my sweatshirt. FML
Today, I was walking my dog but every time he looked like he was about to "go", he became uninterested with the spot and kept walking. I, following behind, tripped over a bump in the sidewalk and face planted. My dog then finally urinated, all over my aching body. FML
Today, I woke up at 5 a.m. to my dog jumping off of my bed. No big deal. I rolled over to the other side of the bed to fall back asleep and my face landed right in a puddle of his pee. I tasted it. FML
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Top comments
XxbladixX 0
^^ lmao Thats more of an FML for the dog, you can wash your hands. "Today, some random dude peed on me when I walked past him. FML" :p
AndelleRae 9
I'll bet you were really pissy when you found out, huh?
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Comments (46)
halliebee22 0
gahh who the hell wud do that. wow. dumb ass people these days still somehow amaze me...
iDollFace 0
wow what kind of....babarians these days are just too lazy to use the potty!
bibbit 0
more like F the dogs life
NOTHAPPENING 0
awe, that poor dog!
suzieq181218 0
That's just sick.
bmonehh 0
>:o
ColdGold 6
Find out who did that and pee on them or in their drink or something.
sparxva 12
F' the dog's life more than yours. What kind of imbeciles were at this party?
doomedman 0
i honestly hope that those people who peed on the dog were drunk and fell of the porch, or what ever they were standing on, and landed on some sharp pointy rocks.
mariahrawks 0
Today, I was minding my own buisness when someone peed on me from the 2nd story balcony. I'm a dog so I only get baths once a week. FML