Today, I caught my dad sneaking a drink of whiskey outside, shortly before my wedding. I asked if he was seriously getting drunk at a time like this. He looked at me and scoffed, "It's the only way I'm gonna get through this stupid shit." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my drinking problem became apparent when my daughter asked for a glass of juice, and I instinctively poured a large glass of scotch instead. FML
Today, my wife, who has a drinking problem, looked me straight in the eye as she poured herself a "water" bottle to enjoy while at work. FML
Today, I horribly lost a game of basketball against my dad. It wouldn't have been so humiliating if he hadn't been piss drunk at the time. FML
Today, my dad asked me if I'd started smoking, I gave him a big speech about how I never have and never will. Two hours later, he found my stash of cigarettes under my bed. FML
Today, my husband and I woke up to see my drunk mother passed out on our couch. She was wearing nothing but socks. FML
Today, my friends and I went out drinking, and luckily enough, the guy I have had a crush on for four years now was there. I tried to get drunk so that I can make a move and blame it on the alcohol. I went in to whisper my confession in his ear... only to puke on him. FML
Today, I had my first glass of red wine after months of pregnancy and giving birth. Just as I sat down and started to relax, I spilled it all over myself and my in-law’s couch. FML
Today, my husband recorded me getting out of bed and sleepwalking all the way into the backyard and straight into our pool. He was too busy giggling like a schoolgirl to help me out. FML
Today, I had to announce to the whole house that I was going the bathroom, because the lock on the door is broken. Before I had the chance to wipe, my dad loudly burst through the door, stark bollock naked, to take a shower. FML
Today, I went to a Nativity play. My husband showed up late and drunk, and I had to explain to him why booming, "Yeah! Time to get baby Jesus up in this shit!" when our son was about to go on stage got us kicked out. FML
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Top comments
Markovski 18
That's rude. A dad should be more mindful and respectful, ESPECIALLY at a time like this.
DiamondGirlj 18
Do the same thing if your invited to his anniversary
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Comments (99)
Flyndaran 10
I will assume you're being satirical or a Devil's Advocate to suggest the dad's likely idiotic pathetic defense of his actions. Good job, though the sexism from absolutely nowhere was unnecessary.
thatcoolguy123 14
You should've kicked him out of the church or wherever this happened. That's not a time to say something like that.
rachelllllb 18
thats awful! what a thing to say to someone on their wedding day, parents are there to support you not put you down!
Tonisha1989 11
Well he's in an uncomfortable situation. Just be glad he came. Others don't get that. And if it gets him to calm down and shut up then let him.
Spadoinkle 10
Weddings in general suck. If he wasn't visibly drunk or acting obnoxious, then I don't see the problem. I'd probably do the same thing. I really hate attending weddings. They're usually so long and drawn out, and a lot of the other people in attendance are annoying as shit. A drink or two can go a long way in helping you get through all the b.s.
Badkarma4u 17
Man people love to make assumptions. He took a drink. He didnt turn up a bottle. Some people take a drink now and then to calm nerves..
cbroady0529 9
The fact that you chastised him for taking a drink tells me he probably has a point. Unless he was being obnoxious you need to chill out.
whassallt26 13
Why is everyone such a ****** on this website, how do you even know if it was a joke or not, I mean I see my self a pc but these people are just over the top honestly
mywolfie 10
well I hope the wedding went off without a hitch
squarecircles 13
Maybe he meant nothing personal and just doesn't like formal/social gatherings?