Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around. I was sitting up on my bed when he reached down near my privates and said, "Wow babe, did you shave today? It's so soft…" He was actually touching my bottom roll above my vagina, which delightfully formed a crease. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around. When he slipped his hand down my pants, he scratched my pubic hair and said "scruffy, scruffy, scruffy." FML
Today, I was laying in bed with my boyfriend. He started caressing me, his eyes were closed, and he said, “I love touching your boobs.” Which was actually a roll of fat on my stomach. FML
Today, during foreplay with my boyfriend, I put my legs around his neck. He pushed them away violently, shouting, "Bloody hell, it's prickling me!" I'd shaved the day before. FML
Today, while in bed, my fiancé rolled over in the dark and complimented me on my nice buttocks. He had actually grabbed a roll of back fat. FML
Today, my boyfriend snuck up behind me while I was naked and whispered in my ear to bend over. I thought this was a lead up to doggy style but nope, he slapped a waxing strip on my exposed bum hole and ran off yelling, “No more hairy hole! No more hairy hole!” FML
Today, I crawled into bed, naked, wanting to get some, and hoping to surprise my boyfriend who's always complaining that I don't sleep naked. When he finally got into bed he rolled over, touched my bare ass, and said "Oh…" then rolled back over and went to sleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were snuggling and telling eachother nice things. The nicest thing he could think of to say to me was "Well, I see you shaved your mustache." FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was moving his hand from his thigh to my chest but on the way he sort of squeezed my stomach. When I asked him why he did that, he told me that "his fingers got stuck under my roll." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML
Today, as my boyfriend and I were messing around in his room, he took off my underwear. As he was about to go down on me, I spread my legs to help out. He then looked up at me and said, "You got some toilet paper left behind." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
vitamin_f 0
Why does it crease vertically in the middle like a vulva does? That's what I don't understand, lol.
itsfuntobesexy 0
That's disgusting.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (94)
Rayn4u_fml 0
Delightful indeed...lol
luis420 0
lol more Cushing for the pushing
itsfuntobesexy 0
That's disgusting.
MissAndreaSummer 0
ewww, this is soo gross!
Tri_fml 5
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
LANCERZzZz 0
so where's the top roll?
vitamin_f 0
Why does it crease vertically in the middle like a vulva does? That's what I don't understand, lol.
yayme 0
SHAVE!!!!!!! lol, save the rain forest, dont create one
NeverLetHerGo 0
LOL! You're my hero. rofl. Made me laugh out loud.
i_wuz_nver_here 31
Hehe I just got an image of a giant with a huge razor shaving the great forests off the earth...
xXCherrryBombXx 6
'shave' the rainforest, don't create one :)
Firewall_fml 0
When it comes right down to it, a guy can sex damn near any part of a woman. Half the time, as long as he doesnt see it, and the angle is right, its as good as a ******...
tina_fml 0
Lose some weight.....
MissFae 0
After I had my babies, I got the vertical indent. :( It's my "front butt" /me finds the motivation for her workout today.
cali28_fml 0
Be nice you guys... I think that was embaressing enough for her to learn a lesson from it.
LunaaBluee 27
A lesson of what... To not be overweight ?? Wuuuttt