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Anonymous Darien, United States

Smooth criminal

Today, I was walking down the street, when a little old lady bumped into me and fell over. I helped her up and she thanked me for being "such a nice young man". It was only an hour later as I was in line at the store that I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet. FML

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Fall

Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Same thing different taste

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I can imagine now what you would be saying to the cops. 'Help me officer I was robbed by a senior citizen.'

That's why you can't always trust old people. They look sweet but are all secret evil geniuses.

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Comments (127)

74- FML n00b

She's going to need to buy an air conditioner with that stolen wallet cuz where she's going it's going to be hot

When does the narwhal bacon? xD

StevenStamkos 2

That's Gran Theft Auto right there!

It was actually Johnny Knoxville who bumped into you.

Reminds me of that scene in Dumb & Dumber - Lloyd: "I got robbed by a sweet old lady on a motorized cart. I didn't even see it coming!" Sucks, OP, but at least she didn't stick a gun in your face. :|

hateevryone 15

She all of that just to jack you.

Wow, she knows exactly how to handle you. FYL OP. Take a stand, be a man! At least go back and get your balls, because she apparently keeps them with her at all times.

Explain that to your credit card agency...

Lizzy500 16

'I've been pickpocketed'... yeah, that was a bitch to explain.

Hey karmas a bitch watch her fall for real next time and break her hip