Slam the brakes
Today, I totaled my car, because I mistook the leaves blowing across the road for a child. I swerved and hit a tree. The home owner wants to sue for "harming his tree" and hospital wants to test my mental stability. FML
Today, I totaled my car, because I mistook the leaves blowing across the road for a child. I swerved and hit a tree. The home owner wants to sue for "harming his tree" and hospital wants to test my mental stability. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I decided to clear up some storm damage. I carefully cut a tree that was threatening to fall on my house. It fell on my neighbor's house instead. He's taking me to court for damages. FML
Today, the tree that my neighbors have neglected to cut down fell on my car. They claim that by law, they aren't responsible and don't have to pay for it. FML
Today, I was in a college band rehearsal when I got a call, saying, "Your car was just hit by a tree!" I said, "Yeah, right!" and hung up on her. Minutes later, the band manager walked in and told me that my car was totaled. I then went and stood in the rain to watch a tree get cut off my car. FML
Today, I swerved off the road and hit a tree in order to avoid hitting a dog that came out of nowhere. Don't worry, I didn't hit him. The person behind me did, though. FML
Today, my neighbors threatened to sue me because a six-foot branch fell off one of my trees and into their yard, hitting nothing on the way down. FML
Today, a tree fell on our 3-month-old family car. Today, I also learned that my husband never insured it. It's probably scrap, and we still have to pay it off for the next 5 years. FML
Today, I accidentally bumped into another car on the road. The worst of the damage was a slight chip to the other driver's paint, but she played it up so much that she ended up being taken away in an ambulance. I'm now terrified that the crazy bitch is going to sue me. FML
Today, I ran a stop sign that was completely obscured by foliage, in a city I was unfamiliar with. A city bus then T-boned me. My car is now totalled, and I’m afraid this will now go to court. FML
Today, a car hit me. I didn't get hurt, but someone called 911. The old woman who had hit me got out of the car with no problem to look at me, and gets back into the car. When the police arrive, she pulls out crutches and said I made strange faces and made her hit me. I got blamed. FML
Today, I crashed my car. I saw a deer getting ready to run into the middle of the road, and I was very sleepy, so I panicked and slammed on the brakes, causing me to lose control of the car on the wet road. After I hit a tree, I realized that the deer was a plastic lawn ornament. FML
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Top comments
FYLbeotches 5
Tree murderer
KeannaLove 32
I really don't see how you can mix those two up... Well at least if the hospital finds you crazy you'll get a little vacation.
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Comments (165)
sammi3baby 1
Well at least you wouldn't have hit a kid
r0ckoman 0
you don't have to be a tree hugger but you don't have to be a tree killer
LilMissZer0 6
You didn't happen to have been driving a Surburban did you?
fredman0000 6
At least if it was a child they would have lived
hateevryone 15
talk about a situation. wow!
Okayitwasme 0
Did you hit a fence too and do you drive a suburban?
iilovecokee 6
I mistake leaves for squirrels all the time.
rubberduckie94 13
You actually made me smile. Your pretty good.
shotgunsinner4 0
I never laughed so hard at a fml. I lost it at the first sentence lmao hahaahahahahahahaha
rlozano1 2
Hahaha this sounds like the opposite story to an fml #18880054 a few post below this.