Today, my 4 year-old son got a hole in his head from doing a twirl jump off bricks out the back. After being in hospital for 8 hours, my car battery was flat from me leaving the lights on. My husband went to get a new battery and lost his wallet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I totaled my car whilst rushing to pick up my son from daycare. This happened as I was leaving the hospital, after dropping off a wheelchair to my recently disabled wife, who is taking care of our newborn in the special care unit. FML
Today, I let my son take my car out for a spin, since he just got his licence. He didn't make it out of our street before totaling it. FML
Today, I had to take my son to the ER after he badly messed up trying to light his farts on fire. FML
Today, my father went out to get batteries for the remote control helicopter I bought him for Christmas. In his excitement, he backed his truck into my car. FML
Today, I went shopping with my parents. Halfway through, I got separated from them and tried to call them only to find out my cell phone battery was flat. A few minutes later, an announcement was made for a lost child. It was by my parents. I'm 36. FML
Today, I woke up and saw my new car was gone and my son seemed very shifty. When I questioned him with the cops, he admitted to taking it for a joyride and "leaving it" behind a derelict mall. We drove over. It was wrapped around a light post, completely destroyed. FML
Today, my phone died. I plugged it in to charge and then went out to run some errands. When I returned, my phone was no where to be found, and our shovel was on the floor, muddy and wet. I then discovered my 6-year old son had buried my "dead" 200$ palmpilot because he had felt sorry for me. FML
Today, my son thought he'd take my new car for a drive without permission. He accelerated straight into a tree, reversed into a lamppost and then accelerated again into the neighbours car. FML
Today, after a snowstorm my son decided that boarding off the roof onto my truck would be fun. My truck now has a puncture wound. The same truck that drove him to the hospital for his puncture wound and broken arm. FML
Today, I walked outside, slipped, busted my head, and had to get 7 stitches. Turns out my son thought it would be funny to spray the sidewalk with water last night so it would freeze. He got a laugh, and I spent over $100 on the stitches. FML
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Top comments
Vesi 30
FWIW, keep a "jump box" or jumper cables in your vehicle. You should have been able to jump start it and not need an entirely new battery.
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Comments (1)
Vesi 30
FWIW, keep a "jump box" or jumper cables in your vehicle. You should have been able to jump start it and not need an entirely new battery.