Today, while sleeping off my hangover, my niece asked me to get her a drink. I gave her a beer, I didn't notice it until it was gone. She is only 6 years old. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my niece stole a bottle of whiskey from me to mix with Monster and get drunk with her boyfriend. It was a bottle of 23-year-old Pappy Van Winkle's that cost over $2000. FML
Today, I was babysitting a 9-year-old kid, when she got thirsty and asked for a drink. All I could find was some kind of Mexican fruit drink, but I didn't realize until too late that it was actually hard liquor. I had to scrub her mouth out with toothpaste and put her to bed to cover it all up. FML
Today, my drunk sister threw up on me while I was sleeping. FML
Today, my sister took me out shopping for my birthday and had been drinking a Monster the whole day. Halfway back home, I took a sip of it and she screamed, but it was too late. I had drunk the phlegm that she spat into the can earlier. FML
Today, I got drunk and tried to talk with my crush. I ended up telling her that she reminded me of my nieces. FML
Today, I wanted to pretend to have a seizure so my baby sister could know when to call 911. When I fell down and started to pretend, she decided to drink my soda instead of helping me. FML
Today, while we were at a work party, I noticed a drunk lady in the mix. I pointed out to my boss how dumb she looked. It was his daughter. FML
Today, my daughter ran up to me and gave me a cup. She said it was lemonade that she made with her friend. When I took a sip, she giggled and ran back to her room. It was not lemonade. FML
Today, I was babysitting my 8-year-old niece. I left her for 10 minutes so I could take a shower, only to walk in on her with her dress rolled up, peeing on the floor. FML
Today, I went to buy beer underage for a party to impress a girl. I picked up the case of beer and went to the cashier, he ran it through without asking for ID. I left the store with a smirk on my face, I arrived at the party and showed the case to the girl. It was non-alcoholic. FML
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Top comments
Robert Cruikshank 7
Stop drinking. You are not responsible with your drinking.
shannon2348 14
That's bullshit. How do you "accidentally " give a kid a beer? ydi
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Comments (12)
Mathalamus 25
You are an idiot.