Today, I went to my crush's house. We were watching a movie when suddenly he started kissing me. As it deepened he began to feel around. He was groping my armpit the whole time but I was too embarrassed that my underarm could pass for my boobs to redirect him. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my two friends and I went to the movies. One of my friends brought my crush. They started making out, leaning over the armrest, until they were practically in my lap. Saliva got on my arm. FML
Today, my crush and I were hooking up and as he slipped his hands up my shirt in order to "feel me up" he started rubbing around my whole torso. When I asked him what he was doing, he replied, "Well I was looking for your boobs but… apparently you have none." FML
Today, my crush came to my house to watch movies with me. We were sitting on the couch when he turned to me and said that he had had a dream about me the night before. I moved in to kiss him, thinking he liked me. He then added that I had fallen of a cliff and he had pissed himself laughing. FML
Today, I took my crush to see a movie. During the movie, I made a move and put my arm around her. As I reached over, my hand went straight into the popcorn tub, and I knocked it over. It spilled everywhere, all over her lap, all over me, and on the floor. I spent the next 15 minutes trying to clean up, while she awkwardly avoided eye contact. FML
Today, my crush was giving a presentation in class. I zoned out and began staring off into space - which happened to be in the exact direction of his crotch. When I realized what I was doing, I quickly looked up at his face. He was already looking at me, with an expression of severe discomfort. FML
Today, my guy friend and I were in his dorm room watching a movie when he started kissing me. Things heated up so we moved things over to his bed. He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate had been up there the whole time and he wanted a high-five. So they high-fived. FML
Today, my family and I were laying on my parents' bed watching a movie. My dad wrapped his arm around me and began rubbing my shoulder. That would have been fine, if it actually had been my shoulder and not my boob. Needless to say, we were both mortified. FML
Today, I finally worked up the courage to ask my crush to a movie. What I didn't realise is that she would bring a "friend" along, and that I would have to sit next to them making out for 2 hours. FML
Today, I finally had an opportunity to flirt with the guy I have a crush on. We danced together all night and everything was going well… too well apparently, because out of nowhere, he kissed my sister, who knew about my crush on him but still kissed him back. FML
Today, my crush took me to a park and told me he loved me. We sat on an old bench and were just about to kiss when I screamed. I now have a huge splinter in my arse and he can't stop laughing. FML
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Top comments
Pyapi 20
Maybe he has a thing for armpits instead of boobs??
juliapow22 5
You should probably start working out
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Comments (84)
letsgooo_fml 23
I'm sorry, but can someone explain this to me? How does someone mistake an armpit for a boob? Even if OP is overweight, she can't possibly be so overweight that her armpit and boob are the same size, right? And OP, you got to make out with your crush, so I'd say it's been a pretty good day!
bluefrootloops 13
He was just getting some side boob action.
Sirmrcrowley 12
Next time you make out with him just tape a stick of secret to his hand. Boom, next.....
plunkit 6
Maybe he felt some hair in there and thought he was on to something!
HaloeNae 15
The comments on here make this even more hilarious than it started out to be(:
frip_fml 9
Arm ****.
HaloeNae 15
This would be great as an illustrated FML
strohm89 3
Might wana drop a few lb's.
Omniprism 15
All guys need direction when it comes to sex. Everybody is different and feels different things in different places. Girls need direction too. Don't be scared next time and if it seems awkward laugh it off. Have fun.
blackychan63 12
Eew.....