Today, I told my girlfriend that my identical twin and I are not in fact related, that he's adopted, and that the only reason we look exactly the same is because we eat and drink the same things. She actually believed it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend told me that his daughter only liked me because she thought that we look like siblings. FML
Today, I saw my girlfriend at the store and joyfully greeted her. She got really mad at me - it was her identical twin sister, who I still cannot tell apart from my girlfriend. We've been dating for three years. FML
Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML
Today, I found out my wife of 5 years, with whom we have three kids, is actually my cousin. At a family dinner someone had pointed out how much she looks like my uncle. We laughed until she mentioned that she was adopted from the same town my uncle's ex-wife had a baby. A few questions and a blood test later, we all learned the sick truth. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend what she loves the most about me. She said it's the fact that I look like her cousin. FML
Today, I found out that my sister has been telling people I’ve been dead for the last 3 months, to cover up the fact she used me to commit identity fraud. We’re identical twins. FML
Today, I had another dinner with the girl that I started dating a few weeks ago. During dinner, we talked about our families. We realized that we're actually cousins. FML
Today, my mom dropped me off at a friend's house. Upon leaving, my friend's mom said how much I looked like my mother. My mother then replied, "That's funny, she was adopted." This was the first I'd heard of this. FML
Today, my girlfriend of three months got mad at me because I thought she was attractive. She has an identical twin, and she says if I think she's attractive, I must want her twin too. FML
Today, I met this girl who's perfect. Turns out, since I'm adopted, she might be my sister. FML
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Top comments
BlowinChronic 18
Well, you can't fix stupid and you've also gotten yourself into a hole because whenever you tell her that you were joking she's going to hate you for making her look stupid.
KylieMangion 22
Wow....someone's really gullable
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Comments (94)
Tones217 9
You wouldn't have done that if you didn't think she was that stupid in the first place.
wanderingshopper 13
Obviously she trusts what you say. That was just mean to do to her and it makes you look stupid too. I imagine we will see a post soon about how some girls idiot boyfriend tried to convince her that his identical twin was adopted. With people posting to her to drop the idiot.
Krimzon 5
So did I until I read your last scentence. -_-
TheSchwartz 3
Well, maybe she'll believe you when you tell her "it's only a cold sore."
Derpylicious 3
Why are you with this idiot?
TheMystery13 13
So find out about something that is a concern for her (for example a health issue) and tell her that the best way to prevent/insure it (whatever the case may be) is some sex act that she has thus far been unwilling to perform, like for example, bringing her sister along.
Bludmagnus 13
Burning stupidity.... simple as that...
wengel 1
If you haven't managed to convince her to try a three-way yet you are wasting a golden opportunity here.
VampTat 10
Where exactly is the FML in this this?
jmw24 8
so your plan worked. whats the problem? that you finally realised how thick your girlfriend is?