Today, my dad married his fiancée, who insists I call her "Mom." I'm three years older than her, and went to the same high school. She's taking me shopping next week to buy me "something nice." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my mom's fiancé. He's a nice guy, he's also my wife's dad. I'll soon call my wife my sister. FML
Today, I learned who my dad's new fiancée is. Upon meeting her she exclaimed, "My, I haven't seen you in a while!" She's my ex-boyfriend's mom. FML
Today, my dad is getting married for the 4th time. First it was my mom, then as they got older, he married a woman 10 years his junior, then his third wife was my age and 28 years his junior. Now at the grand old age of 64, he is marrying a 22 year old, 42 years his junior, almost 2 decades younger than me. FML
Today, I learned my 40 year old father is marrying a girl barely a year and a half older than me. She told me not to be afraid to call her mom. I was torn between punching her in the face and vomiting. FML
Today, my father told all of us that he eloped with his girlfriend of two months. I'm engaged to the woman's daughter, and have been engaged since before they met, but now my family is making fun of me for marrying my "sister". FML
Today, my dad's new wife, who is two years younger than me (I'm 24) and hates that I'm a lesbian, threw a fit when I told her that I would never call her Mom. My dad took her side. I don't live with them but still… FML
Today, my dad introduced me to my half-sister. He'd only recently found out that he had another daughter by another woman, and had only just met her. She and I have been in the same class in school for the past three years. FML
Today, my mother got remarried. I am now officially older than my step-father. FML
Today, my daughter got engaged. Her fiancé is not only 25 years older than her, but was her teacher in middle school. FML
Today, my new step-dad proposed to my mom during a family trip to Wal-Mart. FML
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Top comments
CateXOX 0
I think your dad has some serious issues...
Astroman129 7
whatever. She can't control what comes out of your mouth.
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Comments (272)
RKD 23
Screw it. Nothing you can do, so I would be sure she bought me something REALLY nice! Cash in while you can!
fly101 0
thats nasty
Deathchair 7
Buy her an eyeliner for her birthday, then say that she can look like a princess.
elbub18 2
If you're from the united kingdom, why do you say 'mom' and not 'mum'?
deatheater97 0
shes probably a gold digger
xSeductivexBunni_fml 1
Bingo.
plasmicmac 6
132 - no. you're a moron.
hibbitsra 1
not to be mean or offend or anything, but wouldnt that make your dad a pedophile?
jbsington 8
64 - yeah, because then she'd be a freshman.
DaniLand 0
When you find out this gal is cheating with your boyfriend take pictures and 1: send them to me 2: black mail the shit out of that lil silver fox ( ak money$$) lovin *****.
goldberg34 0
I honestly do feel bad for you