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Anonymous This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff United States

Party pooper

Today, I had a bunch of friends over for a party. My mom came stumbling into my room, crying about how she was officially menopausal, and that I was going to "die an only child." FML

Collection

Fall

Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Top comments

Menopause makes women crazy, try to avoid your mother as much as possible for the next few years.

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Comments (82)

Menopause turns mothers into raving lunatics and/or sobbing piles of depression. If she's ever stomping around the house with a broom or a baseball bat, an insane look on her face, and talking to herself, RUN. Because "it can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead."

My mother wasn't a raving depressed lunatic. My mother just had hot flushes and left my dad, and there was much rejoicing.

I see what you did here!... +1 for the quote from terminator.

You're an only child? LUCKY.

Breeders. [rolls eyes]

Menopause causes very serious mood swings.

leadman1989 16

They can always still adopt... or the more fun less plausible option of cloning you. Which your clone comes out super prefect but tries to eliminate you and turns evil eventually your mom has to choose whom to drop into a vat of acid!!! Or adoption? Yeah I vote adoption. :)

oh wow.

Well at least no one is bored at the party..

It was a subtle hint about her plans to kill you! GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN!!

LOL! my mum is like that. my friend was talking about her little sister and I mentioned being glad I was an only child as my mum came through the living room. hearing this, my mum lifts her top, rubs her tummy and announces that her 'baby bank' is closed. being an only child is awesome aha

Well it's FYM life. For you.... it just means more stuff, and forget all the crap about sharing.