Ouch

Today, after months of telling my landlord about the weak floorboards in my living room, I fell through them as I was trying to repair them myself. FML

Watch your step

Today, I was walking next to this building that was getting renovated, and read a sign that said "Watch out for falling debris at all times." While I was watching out for debris, I fell down a staircase. FML

Slumming it

Today, my mum and I were moving the last of
 my stuff into my new flat when I heard some creaking. The sound was
 coming from the bathroom, so I went to check it out. As I stepped 
through the door, the floor collapsed and the bathtub and I fell
 right through. FML

Today, I was woken at 4 a.m. by the sounds of someone crashing down the stairs. I scrambled out, still half-asleep, to find out that nobody was in an agonized heap at the bottom. The walls are so thin in my house that I could hear the neighbour falling down HIS stairs. FML

Today, I discovered the crunching noise your foot will make if you accidentally drop a cement block on it. FML

Today, I was walking through my kitchen when I discovered a weak spot in the floor. Tomorrow, I'm going to have to fix the giant hole caused when I put my foot through it. FML

Careful

Today, I was walking up some stairs, and I told the guy in front of me to be careful, as the handrail was loose and well-worn. I then put my hand on it, and promptly fell backwards down the stairs with a piece of handrail still in my hand. FML

Today, I fell down the stairs while reading the 'mind your step' sign. FML

Home Improvement

Today, I heard what sounded like an explosion from the basement of my house. Turns out my foundation cracked. FML

Today, I found out I sleepwalk. How you might ask? By awakening the moment just before I fell from the stairs. I was better off sleeping. FML