Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my man juice all over me. I'm 40 years-old, and haven’t had a wet dream since my early high school days. The worst part is that the only dream I remember involved going to the DMV. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom woke me up from a wet dream, because I was moaning too loudly. I'm a 32 year-old virgin. FML
Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML
Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML
Today, I had the most action in months when I woke up to a wet dream. I'm married, I guess that tells you all about my sex life. FML
Today, I had a wet dream. When I woke up, I was touching myself. Unfortunately, I also woke up to find that I had fallen asleep on the couch after eating too much at a family reunion. When I looked around the room, over 10 relatives were giving me nasty looks. FML
Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I now dream about jacking off. FML
Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML
Today, I woke up to find out I'd had a wet dream last night. About someone other than my girlfriend. I don't remember anything about the dream, but my girlfriend remembers everything because apparently I talked throughout my dream, and she was right next to me listening. FML
Today, I woke up after a really intense wet dream. Problem is, I'd fallen asleep in the living room. My little brother saw the whole thing. Now he's going around telling family I need to get some. FML
Today, I woke up and realized I'd experienced my first "nocturnal emission". I'm a 24 year-old guy who has been married for 3 months. Guess who isn't getting any. FML
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Top comments
poopface82 25
Don’t kink shame your subconscious.
RichardPencil 32
Did you dream you walked right in, got your license renewed in 30 seconds and got out? That's hot! I oughta do phone sex.
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Comments (5)
RichardPencil 32
Did you dream you walked right in, got your license renewed in 30 seconds and got out? That's hot! I oughta do phone sex.
poopface82 25
Don’t kink shame your subconscious.
Wadlaen 24
There's all kinds of kinks...
Karley Van 13
you can tell you are middle aged when