Today, I accidentally started a fire in my apartment's bathroom while I was high. Last night my girlfriend and I had a chat about how she can't trust me 100%. I feel like an absolute idiot and she's rightfully upset with me. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I yelled at my boyfriend for smoking in the house, because I didn't want the house to smell like smoke. While doing so, I knocked over a candle and lit the couch on fire. FML
Today, my boss told me to not burn the place down while she was outside. When she came back inside, I accidentally started a fire. FML
Today, I wanted to impress my girlfriend with a cool fire breathing trick I learned online, and ended up burning half her room. FML
Today, I went to interview with potential new roommates at a cooperative living house. I decided to bake cookies for everyone, and while touring the house, I forgot about the cookies and set off a small oven fire. All this after professing how responsible I am. FML
Today, while high, I accidentally sent a pizza to my ex-girlfriend's house instead of my apartment. She has a restraining order out on me. This is bad. FML
Today, I invited my girlfriend to come over, telling her I had a surprise. I filled the bathtub and lit a lot of candles to be romantic. She gets here, and we start doing our thing. Until we smell something burning. It was my hair. I now have a bald spot on the back of my head. FML
Today, after I told my roommate last week she needed to find a new place to live because I thought she was psychotic, she set my house on fire. FML
Today, I cooked dinner for the girl I've been dating. Everything was going well until I accidentally set off the smoke alarm. The fire department showed up, and my date spent the rest of the evening flirting with one of the firefighters, so I guess we weren't actually dating? FML
Today, my house was set on fire, courtesy of my ex-girlfriend, who found out that I have a new girlfriend. Most of our belongings are now reduced to ashes. FML
Today, my apartment smelled like something was burning, so I checked the oven, toaster, outlets, and even the hallway. After an hour, I discovered the smell was coming from the candle I had forgotten I'd lit in the bathroom. I had spent an hour investigating a fire that wasn't happening. FML
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Top comments
Chazzster 32
Frankly you are right about one thing - You are an idiot, at least when high… For at the least your own sake, learn from this. People can die from fires and at the least lose everything you own. When I was a child we had an electrical fault that caused a fire and it was Dad’s quick thinking that save me - We lost nearly everything including where we lived. We had to move in with my Dad’s parents for a while. FIRE IS ******* SERIOUS!
Hangryko 32
If you can't get high responsibly, stop getting high! You're going to get yourself or others hurt.
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Comments (4)
Chazzster 32
Frankly you are right about one thing - You are an idiot, at least when high… For at the least your own sake, learn from this. People can die from fires and at the least lose everything you own. When I was a child we had an electrical fault that caused a fire and it was Dad’s quick thinking that save me - We lost nearly everything including where we lived. We had to move in with my Dad’s parents for a while. FIRE IS ******* SERIOUS!
Hangryko 32
If you can't get high responsibly, stop getting high! You're going to get yourself or others hurt.
core01 30
JFC. Grow up
Iamthebanzai22 21
Use this as a reason to go straight. We unsuccessfully tried to save my sister from a house fire years ago. It's not as much fun as it looks in the movies, trust me.