Today, my boyfriend gave me a teddy bear keyring. I had to explain that although many grown women like cuddly toys, I don't. And even if I did, a filthy, soaking wet bear he found in a puddle on the street is not a nice gesture, despite his suggestion I can just wash it in the machine. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I told my boyfriend that I think teddy bears are THE most pointless and careless gift. He shyly gave me my birthday present afterwards. It was a carebear. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a teddy bear. I thought it was a sweet thing to do, until I saw him open a slit in its back while visiting later in the day and removing a bag of weed. He gave me a teddy bear just so he could smuggle drugs past my parents. FML
Today, while at Six Flags my boyfriend won a huge stuffed animal for me. After a whole day of carrying it around, when he dropped me off he told me that he wants the stuffed animal back. He just didn't want to carry it around all day. FML
Today, feeling down and dejected because of the shitty weather and none of my friends or family wanting to spend time with me to feel loved I took my favorite stuffed animal and that says 'I love you' when you squeeze it. I squeezed it. Nothing happened. Even an inanimate object rejected me. FML
Today, I had to ask my boyfriend to take a shower, because he smelt awful and wanted to cuddle. After 45 minutes, he did so. I wanted to cuddle and fool around after he was done. I got rejected because he didn't want to get dirty. FML
Today, my boyfriend bought me a voice personalized Build-a-Bear. I thought he was going to propose to me through it, only to press the foot of the bear and hear, "We should break up" instead. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend surprised me with a gorgeous, giant stuffed tiger as a belated birthday gift. I thought it was a lovely gesture until a friend told me she had thrown it in the dumpster behind our building this morning. FML
Today, I bought my niece a huge stuffed teddy bear for her birthday because I wanted to be the cool aunt/uncle. She hugged it, smiled, and then immediately hugged the gift bag instead, because apparently it made a "funny" crinkly noise. I have officially been defeated by packaging. FML
Today, my boyfriend came round to drop off some underwear, which I'd left at his house. Not all of what he brought was mine. FML
Today, per my boyfriend's request, I bought some lingerie. He got so excited when he saw me, he ripped it off me right away. After we were done he used it to clean up. I essentially bought a $40 cum rag. FML
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Top comments
RinoaHeartilly 36
While this sounds mildly annoying, is it really that big of a deal? Just say you don't want it and move on.
iamscott 16
Prepare for the "bear with it" puns, captain!
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Comments (41)
Red_Ralph 16
Your boyfriend sounds unbearable
DanielleinDC 34
Sounds like your boyfriend doesn't know you all that well. I can't imagine what he was thinking picking up a dirty teddy bear key ring and giving it to you.
Armeniangirl_fml 15
at least he tried!
cuz803 46
Gotta take desperate measures to save up cash so he can buy you something amazing later OP. Role with it
interesting33 37
Girl 1: 'My boyfriend bought me a diamond ring!' Girl 2: 'My boyfriend got me a toy he found in the bin.' Girl 3: 'My boyfriend got me a keyring so disliked, the orginal owner didn't even bother to put it in the bin. It is literally not good enough for the bin.' Girl 2: 'Okay you win.'
Pogo4lyfe 1
So your bf saw something, thought it was cute, then thought of you. That's sweet. Except for the part where you shot him down and posted a FML implying that he's a moron. You must be a real barrel of laughs.
Jezterking 15
Sounds more like FhisL...
Twisted_Angel 17
Wow, you're a jerk. maybe he can't afford to buy you nice things, and when he found that, he thought you would like it. it's the thought that counts. don't be such a jerk.