Today, after a nap, I went to scratch my eye and felt what I presumed to be a clump of mascara on my eyelash. I didn't wear mascara today. It was a tick. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up to find a tick stuck to my eyelashes. The only way I know of to get it off is with fire. FML
Today, I applied mascara directly onto my eyeball. FML
Today, I found out that if you cry yourself sleep and forget to take off your mascara, your top and bottom lashes will stick together. Leaving you unable to open your eyes. FML
Today, I was about to get in the shower, when I felt an odd itch in my navel. I saw what I thought was bellybutton lint, so I pulled on it, and quickly realized what I had between my fingers was a still-squirming, headless tick. FML
Today, I was cleaning mouse remains from the kitchen floor, left by my cat. I found a small round thing nearby. With no idea what it was, I picked it up and gave it a little squeeze to see if it was solid. It wasn't, and burst with great force onto my face. I'm pretty sure it was an eye. FML
Today, I was eating a packet of chips while watching TV. I saw a crumb on the table in front of me, so without thinking I picked it up and ate it. It wasn't a crumb. It was a tick. FML
Today, I woke up to a weird feeling on my face. Thinking it was a bug, I slapped at it. It was my freshly-inserted nose ring. FML
Today, I reached to pick out a booger stuck in my nose that had been irritating me, and ended up poking myself in the eye. FML
Today, while I was shaving my nose started to itch. Guess which I shaved and which I itched. FML
Today, after working 8 hours and immediately packing my house for another 6 hours to prepare for moving, I was extremely exhausted and more than ready to brush my teeth and go to bed. I tiredly brushed my teeth with my mascara. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Crash92 0
Where have you been sticking your head?
TurtleGenius 0
Pour gasoline on your eyelashes and set it on fire; that should help. FYL indeed.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (135)
_KingdomEnd_ 0
some1 needs Frontline
runehero406 0
#1, i agree.... something like that happened to me before. I looked on my arm and thought i saw a mole then i was like i don't have a mole there and was in school at the time so i missed info tryin to get it off. failed the pop-quiz
happygoluckyhh 0
That isn't entirely an FML...but that would freak me out. I hate ticks. Lol #3!
youallfailatlife 0
Ticks can crawl, guys. They have legs. They could easily get on your head. FYL though, ticks suck, expecially if it bit ya, that would hurt like hell on your eye.
SuperSpore 0
It would truly be an FML if you got a disease from it. Hope you don't.
Pandora_NoBox 0
That's so gross! FYL
musigreg 0
omg, thats soo icky. haha fuckyoulife indeed.
birds_fml 7
Where the hell did you pick up a tick? I grew up in the woods, and never had a tick before. Also, EWWWW!
hersheyk0 0
i feel like some people click the "you deserved that one" button just to be assholes haha
Rawrrr14 0
oh my god. Ticks are terrible. I'm like, terrified of them..... they're just so weird, odd and painful..... hope you got it off okay though, and I hope you still have eyelashes ;-]